*Disclaimer*

Plase note that this post is not intended to offend anyone or to poke fun at anyone's "Swagger". It's Purley out of curiosity...

So we have been on here for a while and have read thousands of adverts that have been posted. 

Out of all the adverts that we have been through there are certain ones that have stuck in our minds, these adverts are mostly posted by single men and we see them fairly often...

We are curious to know "How successful the guys are / were with these types of adverts"

ADVERTS 
 
1. Who is going to be the Lucky lady that I'm going to let suck my cock today?

2. I'm horny and want my cock sucked now!

3. Looking for a quickie with a very hot Chick during my lunch hour.

4. Looking for sex with a Sexy Chick or someone's wife. No long chats. Dont waste my time. I don't have a car so either you pick me up or pat for uber. 

5 Looking for a Quickie with a sexy woman with big Tit's. But it must be fast because I have things to do in the afternoon.

6  Looking for good sex today. I can host in my car.

These are just a few off the top of my head... So how successful are these types of adverts? 

Any woman that has responded to these adverts and have actually met up with the guys please contact us because you must be alot of fun.

Drove past there this evening and there are TO LET signs all over the windows. 

Be sad if it closed down

Quote by DavidCu
Guess it depends on who is in the middle.

 F#ck Sakes! That is so simple To understand. I am an idiot!

Quote by lizaan
lol, i also just thought it was how some people pronounced it. mfm mmf, fmf ffm mff. lol.

 Exactly! Thank god Im not the only one

So I've been in this Lifestyle since high school. 

In Every relationship I've had over the years I have always remained swinging.

I wouldn't call myself an expert when it comes to the lifestyle but im not a rookie... So I thought!

I was TODAY Yrs Old, when i found out that their is a HUGE difference between MMF & MFM! 

I've always thought it was the same thing... 

In our relationship, I am usually the one that places the adverts and Organisers the play dates...

So I started going back to see all the ads and events that I have posted over the years...  WoW!

So obviously My Wife thinks it's F#cken Hilarious because she is the one that picked up my "ignorance" and has been teasing me about it.

My question is...

How would I advertise 5 straight guys and my wife (Gangbang) ?

Because WTF would this mean MMMMMF?

My wife and I were having a "debate" regarding her not believing me that guys have masturbated to thoughts of being with her, as well as jerked off to her pictures and videos.

 Help me win this argument by filling in the POLL!

Quote by Lightersideofgreen

 
So when someone's partner trusts you enough that they are happily willing to let you sleep with their partner, yet you still go behind that persons back and contact that person's partner to have an affair... Shows exactly what type of person you are and you should not be in this lifestyle! (Rather setup a tinder account)

That's exactly what someone on this site tried with us.

The worst thing about this lifestyle has to be the Bull Shitters, Time Wasters and Wankers that seem to be multiplying at a rapid rate.

I think this has caused a lot of people to give up trying and leave this lifestyle. 

But will all the negative people that mess you around it just takes that one person or couple that you just "Click" with, and it makes you realise how awesome and lucky we all are to be apart of this amazing lifestyle...

We have been blessed with meeting some XXXtraordinary people along the way!

First off, if you are in a relationship and you are both enjoying the "lifestyle" (Sleep with other people),  but you still decide to go behind your partners back.... That's a bit of a Douchebag move!

You are getting everything a man could possibly ask for, you can have sex with your partners full knowledge and approval (But you are still not happy)

Secondly - This lifestyle is built on TRUST, without it... It would come crashing down. 

So when someone's partner trusts you enough that they are happily willing to let you sleep with their partner, yet you still go behind that persons back and contact that person's partner to have an affair... Shows exactly what type of person you are and you should not be in this lifestyle! (Rather setup a tinder account)

Having said that... We are on this site for NSA fun. There are married men that contact us to arrange threesomes. We do not get involved with their lives or what they do behind their partners back because it's got nothing to do with us. We are all consenting adults here.

It would be a total different story if we played with a couple and then the husband contacted us to have a threesome behind his wife's back...

I wouldn't tell his wife because he will f#ck his own marriage up (doesn't need our help) but I will make sure that he understands to not contact us again...

I'm also not against issuing a "Physical" warning when needed

Quote by bitchonheat
it connects in the way you appreciate to be touched .../

 That is one of the best descriptions I have ever read! 

Quote by DavidCu
I love encounters with couples but never feel comfortable when I sense the lady is simply going along with things to make her partner happy and isn't really into it herself.  Much prefer a down to earth couple where the female half of the couple is enthusiastic and really wants a MFM play. How do others feel?

 It happens often where the lady is just trying to keep her husband happy and her marriage together. We have walked out of a few play dates once we picked up what was going on. Have also seen woman that were way Too Enthusiastic, this is also not a fun encounter but luckily we haven't had that many bad experiences 

It's a No from us. We don't mind everything else but for us "Kissing" is very intimate so it is something that we keep between us. Having said that we do understand that during the moment of passion with another person t might accidentally happen but it's not something that we would continue doing.

Quote by lizaan
someone told me once, when i asked them. its to cover more basis. make different profiles for different types of people. to suit more peoples needs. but yes, i do get that sometimes some people will create more profiles, cause they burned their old one.

 That makes sense. We could never do that... its a shit load of work just managing 1 profile

Quote by pussinboots1
Being bored is really NOT nice...being housebound neither. Reading is okay.....being a couch potato  is okay for a few days.... eating junk food, just going so far.....binge watching TV series's, just soooo much....
Okay, still being a medically high risk in our current Covit19 situation is just NOT kosher. So We are still mostly isolated.
So sleeping is one thing I am also tired of....but lying awake last night I thought back to my *playing* days.
And NOPE nothing *normal* as you might presume...but think Kinky and you are on the right tract.
All of my kinky toys except some of the older CP toys are now all gone, with it, that useless cock suction contraption (penis pump)I once bought, thinking it will give me hours of joy tormenting some guys cock.
Well that was NOT the case.....useless thing and white elephant at the end of the day.
But I did try many things with it...
Used it to..
Pump smallish titties and larger nipples. which did worked fine to an extent.
Pump the clit of a few ladies..also okay-ish...it is not the ideal pussy pump.
Pumped a few pussy lips...also not ideal but okay-ish.
Now who is brave enough to tell us whom used a Penis pump with success?
And if any ladies tried a Pussy&Nipple pump and what were/are the results?
Now for the ladies I used to make my own nipple pumps  with 50ml. syringes.   
I also obtained a nice electrical breast pump to play with nipples...male or female....stimulated the nipples nicely.
I never bought a pussy pump though...a 50ml syringe worked nicely on a ladies clit as well.
Okay talking about toys...who made some nice ICE dildo`s to play with?
Some Ice sounds??
I also tried using some cupping cups to sensitize nipples and clits ...also not ideal...but I have to say syringes worked better for me.
Please tell me there are some kinky guys with me here..

 I bought one about 14 years ago and tried it a few times. Don't think i did it 100% correctly (for fear of causing permanent damage).

But it definitely worked. It made my Cock look like it was on Steroids and Angry! I was a bit Scared of it so i used to jerk off with 2 hands (Just in Case)

Quote by pussinboots1
@59seeman I am sure you can tell couples ladies or gents you liked their photo, No need for more. Most people posting photo`s would like to know if it is revered or not. Should someone take offence, it is really on them and not you specially if it is only a *like* with no comment. 

 Long time no heat pussinboots1. I agree 100%. You can't offend anybody, They can only take offence....

And to be honest if you take offence from guys telling you that your wife is HOT and Sexy, then i dont think this is the lifestyle you should be in!

I get told about 10 times a day how "LUCKY" I am to be married to my wife, and i only just figured out that them telling me that was the most polite way of saying that they want to f#ck her!

Quote by fadnad
I have a quick question if you a couple what comment is a no no or  turn off because I found with us we enjoy the the dirty comments 

 Us as Well. Dirty Comments and messages are the best. Once in a while we get a comment that oversteps the "dirty" side and comes across as Crude and not sexual at all. 

Luckily it has only happened once but besides that it's open season.

We would also prefer guys to tell us what they Want to do with my wife then sending one word messages. 

You guys have permission to Speak your mind and if we think your idea is kinky and fun, you might get to do it

Quote by fadnad
Well I know us as a couple we live comments on our pics it turns the wife on people comment weather it’s a single guy couple or single woman we enjoy reading it so feel free to comment away on our pics 
Plus I think 90% of people posting pics would love comments 

 Quick question... why would the other 10% not love comments... Lol

Quote by 59seeman
Often we would like to comment or just send a like  to some of the couples making the effort  to post pics which we find
very pretty/sexy. Unfortunately we never do . Hesitant it might send the wrong message as our preferences  exclude ladies or couples.
Just saying

 By NOT sending a comment sends a worse message to the couple, especially if they have made an effort and get No response for it!

It doesn't matter what your preferences are if something turns you on or you think is sexy, does not mean that you "Have" to be into the same kink/ or person. 

Quote by 2some4fun
A man in a dress ✖
A man in a dress with boobs 😐
A Thai ladyboy 😈
Does that make me bi? Probably. Do I give a fuck? Definitely not.

 Now thats a "Straight" Answer! 

So its Not Chicks with Dicks...

Its Dudes with Tits!

Quote by DavidCu
I have never been much of a team player. Yes have gone to parties and clubs plus private meetings for threesomes and foursomes but have never understood the idea of a gang bang.  Wondering if women like this scenario and what it is that does it for them?

 We are fans of Gangbangs. From my side, i get sexual pleasure and turned on by seeing my wife get Pleasure... so the more guys there are, the longer and better my pleasure will be....

I think from a ladies point of view it must be a huge confident booster and a turn on that there are more then 1 person lusting over you at the same time. (Imagine 5 woman 100% focused on you and battling to keep their hands off you)

Chappie we had a Gangbang with Cummyfun for my wife's birthday, it was awesome. You will not find a better guy to have a Gangbang with then him.

You cant give up and say its a waste of time. Pulling off a succesful gangbang takes alot of planning and a little bit of luck.

We all know that often a single guy doesnt pitch for arranged playdates due to getting cold feet, their wife came home early or because they are rude wankers that waste your time ot whatever reasons lol...

So now you all of a sudden with a gangbang you have to make sure that you get the right guys together. 

•To meet at a strange place, with bunch of people they dont know. 

•You have to make sure they wont drop you

•You also have to find guys that are able to preform in front of a crowd (Be able to get it up infront of other guys)  

That is where the Luck comes in (Getting all that right). For my wifes biryhday we had just over a 100 confirmed guys that were coming (i knew alot would not pitch). On the day there were 20 there. Not all played some watched, others jerked off etc.Would of been funny if all 100 pitched...

Quote by Stanley1948
Lovely...will definitely wank over her!!

 We want proof...

Best oral sex tip is...  DO IT OFTEN!  

I love going down on woman and can do it for hours (or until im physically stopped from doing it). I also prefer giving then receiving...

Its like eating Ribs... if your Face and Fingers aren't Messy and Covered in "Sauce", That means that You didnt Eat it Properly! Lol

Probably the strangest place is our bed... Lol

Done it in a few places that we probably shouldn't have... Hospital, Clubs, Pubs, Cricket Match, Church, Concerts, Casino, Airplanes, train, on top of a Mountain, Game Drive, on the side of the highway etc etc

I Love guys perving over my wife, and we often get guys sending through "Cumtributes" for my wife. 

She loves the fact that there are guys thinking of her when they jerk off. I think it must be a boost to your confidence.

Quote by The_Valentines
Ash: I was her booty call that turned into a friend with benefits .....the benefit is I get to call her my girlfriend 🤣🤣

BOOM💥 Another Couple that met on Swingingheaven. Im now up to 14 Couples. 

Quote by 2some4fun
Sorry Pooh-C. We agree with the Valentines on this. The adage is Once Bitten - Twice Shy. We are 3 times bitten. The amount of people clinging to their glory days is horrendous. Couples and singles yearning for the days before Uber eats. When they actually made it to a gym and did a work out once or thrice a week instead of ordering in fast food daily and fondly remember the days when they were in shape and that shape wasn't a circle. Or the couples that maintain some sort of daily skin care regimen to ensure that father time hasnt changed that once soft and sensual skin to hard, grainy, coarse leather. And the problem with many of those people...  they send you the pics they took in their prime. And have no qualms about passing them off as their "present day" templates.
We've been caught by 3 of those couples. Pitching up at a bar/resturant to meet and struggling to recognise the people/person that eventually presents themselves. Their Mr sits down and we disciver to our horror, he has let himself go. And while he may have been a model in his heyday - now he'd only be hired to represent the before picture in a Fat Busters commercial. Or their Mrs sits down and we recoil as we see that she was the unfortunate recipient of a case of severe fever blisters. Spending most of her evening dabbing the ooze emanating from the 4 open sores on her lower lip. Imagine pitching at a hotel you've paid for and Shrek and Fiona arrive. Or worse Mrs Large and Mr Larger. Thats why we meet first face to face to test real world chemistries. Then and only then do we commit to something carnal. 

WHO the Hell are you meeting. Lol

We do Video Call the Couples/Singles When we are making the final arrangements, so that sort of gets rid of the bullshitters.

I try not judge people by their weight or are after a swinging experience I had with my ex girlfriend and a couple that She had arranged for us to play with.

I was not in the mood to go and play with her or anyone else (it was nearing the end of our relationship)

We met at this couples house in pretoria and the surprise I got when I saw them was "Life Changing".. Lol

The couple must have been in their late 60's early 70's. There were knitted doilies everywhere and pictures of their grandkids all over the place. The lady was very Large and her husband was very skinny.

My Girlfriend immediately changed her mind about playing and faked having her period. I didn't want to be rude and just leave because I would of felt bad for them, so I just thought "Fuckit I'm here already, let me make the most of it"..

Let be 100% Honest... it was some of the best sex I have ever had. It was also the first time that I tried DP. I'm glad I didn't judge a book by its cover and leave, otherwise I would of missed out on an awesome experience.

There has to be some sexual attraction obviously, but what I have learnt over the years is "Every Woman is SEXY, It's up to the person that's playing with her to bring that Sexyness out of her" ...

And the Sexiest thing a woman can wear or have is Confidence... I don't care what a woman looks like, if she is confident.... She will Ooze Sex Appeal!

Quote by nawtykznguy
So i don't know whether or not this will need a new thread of its own, but considering the majority are tending towards "booty calls"... Does one tend to chatting to the couple/single enough that when you meet for the 1st time play is on the agenda or is the intention... or does one tend to wanting to meet the couple/single; chat and verify; and reschedule a 2nd mate purely for a booty call or playdate between all parties?

 For Us we don't enjoy "meeting 1st to see if we click". It feels like the most awkward first date ever. 

What are you supposed to say or talk about... We are all adults that are on this site with the intention of meeting other people to "Swop Orgasms"..

We would of discussed all the things that we were into and what was not allowed etc before we meet, so what else is there to say...

In the my line of work, I usually spend 2-3weeks at my customers houses and over the years I've had a few "bored housewives" cum on to me...

Even had one offer to Pay me for coming back twice a month to play... but I don't think any of their husbands knew about it ... 

Quote by 2some4fun
We have made friends in the lifestyle. We no longer play with those couples. We cherish the friendship part more then the sex. Not to say the sex was bad. But the friendship is better. If it comes to playing - Booty Calls for us please. Hit It Then Quit It. 

 Just so we both understand .... We are NOT friends! Lol

Please feel Free to use us as a booty call... You can even refer to us as enemies ... (The Sex is better if you have anger towards the other person). Lol