Master of Sex
Unfortunately, I am allergic. Also to spermicide so even some condoms are a no no for me.
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Sofistikitty
3 weeks ago
Straight Mixed Race
Female, 44
0 km · Johannesburg
Forum
Master of Sex
Lol, im the only unicorn on this topic. It's so funny the way, we are being described lol. Like a rare wildlife species. How to lure us in and what to feed us hahaha. Sorry it's funny.
Master of Sex
Correct me if I'm wrong? You mailing mostly females? If so how do u go about it. Personally, I don't respond to couples because of how they approach me. Also, sometimes we want attention from males and maybe haven't changed the details on our profiles. I say if u want to meet real people, get out there to meet and greets etc to network.
Master of Sex
I didn't say it must be removed, only that it is moved somewhere else. Where one makes a conscious decision to like. I appreciate that it has been moved lower down, but it's still in harms way. But what can do.
Master of Sex
Quote by griff
For those who haven't yet read the other thread regarding Admin's reply on the reason behind the Facebook buttons, please below find a copy.
We have set up a page for this site on Facebook
Many people have Facebook accounts, in fact many into this lifestyle have one for family and friends and another for swinging, hitting the Like here is just a vote for this site on Facebook and has nothing to do with privacy, photos or similar, those that don't wish to click on Like do not have to, but there will be those that do and that will help the site.
Its actually no different to having a link back to here from another site, of course only those with a private Facebook account that they used for this part of their lifestyle would be likely to click on Like.
We have had links like this on our Australian site http://www.swingersheaven.com.au/ for years and nobody has had any issues with them at all.
The fact of the matter is that having Facebook/ likes helps the site to rank better as it provides social signals to the Google and other search engines.
It's deeply regrettable Sofistikitty that in error the Facebook buttons caused you such grievance and I'm genuinely sorry for that.
Could everyone please note that if in the future you inadvertently click the 'Like' option, all you have to do is click it again to remove the 'Like'.
All good and well, but it stays on the newsfeed.
Master of Sex
Quote by seven07fs
I had that once, the couple were both significantly older and their physical attributes were not what was advertised. We had coffee and I politely declined them by mail later. Not nice to be mislead like this.
I can relate, I've had it a couple of times. There was a time also when a dudes wife started calling and mailing me. I didn't know he was married. There's those types that put pics from 10- 20years ago. They do not look at all like the pics they send. I've met a guy that portrayed himself as a gentleman but when we met physically, he was the opposite, crude, pervy etc. I walked out.
Master of Sex
Is that what you say there in their faces? Like in the flesh? Or via text?
Master of Sex
So you see an alluring alias. Their half revealing pics or no pics but intriguing profile grabs your attention. You guys move to bbm or email or what's app. Then you start calling each other and decide to meet. You choose a day, time and venue and they show up, they don't look anything like you thought( from what you have seen) or they are not who they portrayed themselves to be. Or maybe there's just no attraction from your side.
What do you do? What follows after that meeting? How do you decline?
Master of Sex
Quote by redbruce
Site mods must remove it. I go through a straining process of logging out of every single social network site I am on before logging in because of this, with the hope that even if I press by mistake it won't pop up on and page of mine. I do not own a naughty twitter or facebook account and don't want to either. Apologies Sofistikitty. Reading this has made my fear levels increase ten fold.
Just to point out - the mods (assistants) are powerless to remove it, only site admin (the owners) can. The issue was raised by and amongst the mods when it first appeared. Admin felt that there was benefit to the site to have it there. Maybe benefit to the site, but apparently not to individual members!!!!.... as has just been experienced by Sofistikitty :-(
Look, they can keep it on- but not here where it's easy to click it by mistake. I mean if I wanted everyone to know I'm a swinger, I wouldn't have needed an alias and would have put face pics all over my profile. I'm so upset
we all know that people are not open minded and this lifestyle is frowned upon by many. I am now "out of the closet" and not by choice. This really sucks. Master of Sex
Quote by ashleeI have android, so everything os linked.
Site mods must remove it. I go through a straining process of logging out of every single social network site I am on before logging in because of this, with the hope that even if I press by mistake it won't pop up on and page of mine. I do not own a naughty twitter or facebook account and don't want to either. Apologies Sofistikitty. Reading this has made my fear levels increase ten fold.
Master of Sex
Quote by redbruce
So, so sorry Kitty!!!
I totally agree with you - having the "Like" button there is just trouble waiting to happen!!! I questioned its relevance and desirability from day one!! I avoid that area of my screen like the plague!!!!!
As SDMR suggests, it must have been a "virus"!
It's there where the home button is. I must have intentional clicked home, but touched the like button. I wouldn't have known- my friend called me to tell me! I dunno where to hide my face. My gran is on fb! Oh gawd!
Master of Sex
Ay, I have a touch screen and I touched that like on facebook thing. FUCK! Everyone(friends and family) christian and parents board just saw it on my facebook profile. Gawd why is it even on the site??
I'm getting asked left, right and centre bout it. How am I going to show my face at kid's school ay. I really don't think the like button is a good idea. Can't we put it somewhere else, so that we can make a conscious choice? I am so screwed!
Master of Sex
Quote by KC_
I agree with SDMR
Rather have a conversation about why she doesn't want to, so YOU can get a better understanding of her position.
Not to convince her to do something she has clearly stated she has no desire to do.
p.s. I love giving head, but I despise swallowing. When it is time to come, I get my mouth away as fast as possible.
Try tasting your own cum, if you think that is an issue.
Cum tastes gross, regardless of what fruits you eat. But my objection isn't to the taste, it is because I don't like it. simple.
Yes taste but not just a lick-thats not bad. It's the freaking tablespoon full. *gag*
Master of Sex
Damn I have a touch screen, I really don't wanna be clicking like by mistake. Imagine lol! My Oumas on fb
Master of Sex
Quote by Ricky_2009
Hi All
I think its more an issue of being on cam or behind keyboard and being rejected does not compare to physical rejection i guess.
So rejecting any guy onsite he will take the punch but the embarrassment of being rejected by a women face to face will hit his pride.
How does one meet with someone and not show any dislike to being rejected.
I would love to meet like minded people and both you lovely ladies as well. If there is no physical attraction does that mean no friendship either?
Look, in a way you have a point, but we are all "big". Adults take the plunge and stick to their word. If you say you going to meet someone go and meet the worst thing that can happen is you not attracted to one another. If so then have that coffee or drink and friend zone or thank them for meeting up. Then no one wasted time or perfume or outfit lol.
Don't butter person up and lie and make excuses. Rather say you not into meeting you only want to keep it on chat. You know my experience on here, say 2 out of 10 guys pitch up and most of the time I like 1 of them and remain friends with the other. Best thing is to meet at a private event where there's more people to "choose" from. I don't see why people beat around the push if they have no intentions of ever meeting. It doesn't make sense then they should go to sites like chaturbate. Keep it cyber
Master of Sex
I see people reading but not responding. It's the truth though hey. I am also not the only one experiencing problem. Today I got a message from a couple, they been interested in swinging and events all this time. They tell me to invite them but to give them enough time to prepare. So, I do that and I invite them to private event that better suites their needs. First one they said they would love to come and second one they will let me know. Then this morning woke up to a message saying I must not invite them to swingers party again. I must respect that they not into it anymore. I'm so confused.
Got launched again by 2 guys this weekend. So left high and dry yet again! They run after a person and want you. Minute you agree it's as if they were just checking if I would. Couples want private time but more for me and the female to play, when I say I'm not into women it's an issue.
Master of Sex
Most single men on this site complain and rant on of how there are fake people out here, how they never get lucky blah blah blah. Couples complain about how single females don't want to play or how they come across so many fake couples.
Now I'm gonna tell them to shut up cos it's your own fault. Do you know I have better luck outside the swingers scene? Some people on this site and in the lifestyle do not know wtf they want. I have been chatting to guys that I am interested in screwing the daylights out of, but it is such an issue to freaking meet them physically. There's excuses and all that. They let you get dressed and then tell you last minute they not gonna make it or simply don't pitch. Couples as well, they are hot and into the idea then also back out last minute(thats why I don't meet couples anymore, they are the worst)
People complain that there's no parties or events. Then I organise and book venue and again they cancel last minute. The guys that do pitch, look nothing like their pictures, are married and play without consent or are really just not ones cuppa tea.
Also couples get upset because I'm not bi, not every woman likes another's vagina, Cmon guys! Then you get the married singles, that can only see you at certain times. Really? Well, that's it I am no longer giving second chances, no more wasted perfume. I've been here since 2012 looks like things are getting more and more difficult.
Master of Sex
Business partner** well people click attend but are no shows or cancel. We had to cancel because of too little people and could not secure venue. BUT we had a private smaller get together and that was a freaking awesome!! Bit hectic for me lol
Master of Sex
So I've been checking things out and have come to a conclusion: I am expecting too much.
I was looking for sensual encounters, erotic sessions , but all I have found is like sex in a hurry. Banging, frenzied sex. Animalistic sex, "just gotta get it in" sex, "need to cum and cum now sex". Even the "it's not my girl so with fuck her hard" sex while in groups.
This is not what I wanted. I have had some encounters but with guys only (one on one) though, but the more I look at things the more I realise that I'm in the wrong place. Or is this how it goes? Am I expecting and wanting too much?
Even getting approached by people, couples especially chat to u like they gods gift and when one declines, they wonder why. Some people want to just use a person as a sex prop.
I sit and watch things unfold at private gatherings and think that maybe I'm just thinking the wrong way for wanting what I want. Excuse me if I'm rambling on senselessly.
Master of Sex
Oh he'll, I just googled it 
wtf!!!! Oh man that's crazy and disturbing. Is that even possible???
wtf!!!! Oh man that's crazy and disturbing. Is that even possible??? Master of Sex
dude she mainly mentions coloured women,after you click the link scroll down.
Master of Sex
Thought I'd share this with you. Racism is racism whether it comes from a black, white, indian or coloured person. I'm shocked that the paper even published this.
I WOULD'NT WANT MY SONS TO MARRY A WHITE OR COLORED WOMAN! via @ZimToday
Master of Sex
Okay, taken me couple of weeks to think about this, but I have decided to take a break. The site has become mundane, my exposure to the lifestyle has also become a bit overwhelming. So, thank you to those that I have met and become friends with, you probably have me on instant chat(bbm, what's app and email)
I am not deleting my profile as I still organise events. Alternatively I will be on the other profile (menage_a_trois) to organise events.
Keep safe and well. Mwah all
Master of Sex
"Among young adults, men masturbate an average of 12 times a month, while females maturbate an average of 5 times a month."*
This is apparently a fact. Lol that means I'm a man lol or something more- 12 times! That's nothing! Anyone else here disagree with this "fact"
Master of Sex
Please note, I am not attacking white people in general. As far as I'm concerned and how most of us grew up, it doesn't matter what colour your skin is. If I'm attracted to you I'm attracted to you its as simple as that. My gripe is that the people I spoke to said that it would be easier for me to get a white guy to play with a black chick if she had her hiv and sti/std certificate or results handy. Now what I am saying is same people didn't have an issue with me joining(and didn't mention a certificate) neither did they ask for the white females for gang bang. Culture wise we are very different and I am not going to stir that pot right now.
If people and I mean those with the problem are so worried about health risk, they should ask certificates from ALL they play with. Not just the black chick. Or just should not play. It's just sad and fact is look at the site, I have seen one indian couple that has said they only play with indians or whites. I have never seen ( please correct me if I'm wrong) a non white couple except that couple that say they don't cross race barrier. Again I am not saying change your preferences cos it offends others, but then don't message us masala, mixed masala and chocolate chicks(especially) and guys/couples-to come play with you or to come to your parties etc.
That's why I started this business, its so freaking awesome when no one cares and everyone is having a good time.
Master of Sex
Quote by SDMR
If I am reading your post correctly, you yourself have deduced that the reason some guys wanted test certificates was due to race.
They did not seem to say that, in fact by them asking for test certs, they have shown two things:
1) willingness to engage in sexual activities with a person of a different race.
2) the wisdom to take care of health concerns like a responsible adult.
From what I can see, you have made this a race issue.
As far as your comment about non white males having no etiquette goes, it's more about the language barrier than anything else, in fact, in my opinion, 75% of our so called race issues in this country revolve around language barriers. It exists even between white people who speak different languages.
They willing to screw me without one? So what does that mean? Like I said this came from people that have double standards. I have a white lady that requested a gang bang and the no certificate was requested. But when it came to the black lady they requested. So tell me am I assuming wrong? I am not talking out of my own. This is the statements and conversations I have had with white couples and single guys. I am merely saying that these are the concerns. And that I am offended by them. Again, I am not saying ALL men and couples. I am speaking about the people I have spoken to, as I am trying to find a way to merge everyone together. Well, those who are interested anyway.
From experience, I am always invited as a single chick to parties and clubs. the moment I say I am bring a male partner they retract their invite. Some have even asked what race guy is. I'm sorry Shaun, but if you are not in our shoes(non white) you won't have any idea as to what I'm talking about. I am just saying that, it's unfair. Look in actual fact the lifestyle is predominantly white. It's going to take a while before non whites open up and also become more open minded. I'm not saying that people should change over night. I'm saying, don't message then. You know what your preferences are then don't request to join. I know how it feels to be "rejected" cos, in my case the hubby wanted to but the wife gave me the " we don't play outside our race". Pity we could have had fun.
I am venting so please excuse me. Still gots love for all of y'all
Master of Sex
I love music, I do everything even sex to music. I have a very eclectic taste in music. I like linkin park, sade, classical. I grew up with RnB and a little bit of local music. I can't stand Kwaito and also some house tracks. I like music that makes a person's hair on arms stand up. Words with meaning and tunes that make my ears, heart, body and soul sing!
Master of Sex
No the guys basically did a David copperfield like 2 hours before event. The people I got advice from were white swingers (couples and single guys) and that was the response.
Look, I've asked and they didn't respond. I am not only talking about this incident. This whole non whites are more reckless or "dirty" is what's bothering me. Again I am not saying everyone is saying this or have requested that she has a clean bill of health. I mean that the people I spoke to did not know each other yet most gave the same response.
I've seen a forum post where a male of a couple mentioned the same thing. The other issue that came up was the different culture thing. That non white males had no etiquette, I don't think that's a culture thing. Assholes and pervs come in different shapes, sizes and races. I also think that we are more tolerant and open than those people - the percentage that refuse to cross race barrier. It's just weird and shocking.
I believe like some of you have said that regardless of race, people should request tests, certificates from whom ever they are going to play with. Hiv, sti's and stds are not biased or have preferences. Who ever takes part in risky play risks getting it.
