Whats your experience getting attached to someone you play with?

Thought this would be a good place to ask..

Yes, it happens!!

I have no experience of that but I think there is nothing wrong with it as long as there are no jealousy 

You ask a very important question.  Now I feel this demands an answer that we thought about before making an comment.

All I can contribute is my own observations and experiences over the years.
MOST certainly people, especially us women, becomes attached to their FREQUENT sexual partner/s. Now this statement should be looked at closer.
Mostly us women are the culprits here, we do tend to become fond of the persons we have sex with and I do believe most women will agree with me. Men on the other hand, does not really become attached easily, sex is just a sport to them, HOWEVER you do find the odd goose who does become attached and over jealous in his pursuit.
Now becoming attached can cause Problems in itself and sometimes it is just a normal progression between sexual of course DEPENDING the status of your partners and yourself, is also a factor
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IF you are married or playing with a married couple, you (even if you are a part of a couple) SHOULD never become to attached to the other person/s you are playing with. This will only lead to heartache and divorce, for you and your sexual is WHERE the rules of Swinging and sharing your spouse comes in affect. I hope I need not mention the rules here as you are certain to KNOW or at least have read about on how to establish *distance* between you and your sexual partners, and to keep your own attachment to your own partner healthy and strong. IF ANYONE is not up to date with this, PLEASE do go and read up on this!!! 

If you are a single  and playing with couples, you should always prevent becoming too attached to either of the couple, we really should not be here if we cannot do that, you surely do not want to become the *OTHER* woman or man breaking up a couple. IF,  you as the single, finds that it is ONE of the couple,  who is becoming attached to you...BREAK off all contact with that couple, and NEVER allow this to go any further.  THAT is why most couples will not meet anyone alone, once again read up on rules of engagement to keep in mind when you are starting to play as a single, and always  ASK what the rules are for the Couple...There is couples who play  and allow their spouse to play alone....BUT beware of that little devil,  ATTACHMENT!!!!!

The only time an  Attachment is really kosher is when it is 2 singles meeting up, and playing, depending on what their OWN rule is for themselves. Some women and some men do not want to become attached and if the one becomes attached,that will cause problems, Then heartbreak also follows....

Over the years I have seen and heard all scenarios happen, and I found that heartache and divorce is always the result.

A friend of mines parents used to swing with a couple that they were friends with. They used to go on holiday together etc 

(Cutting one short story long)

Both couples ended up getting divorced and marrying each other's exes. They have been married for 20+ years..

This is a Fluke! 

Firstly the reason why most people swing is to take care of our physical needs. If you are a swinger because of your emotional needs you shouldn't be doing this.

Another problem is if you are firstly going to build your new relationship on "You cheating on your Ex " Your new relationship will always have Trust issues.  It will always be at the back of your mind.

Another problem is if you are leaving your partner for someone just because they were good in sack and you had awesome sex then you are an idiot! 

The sex will obviously be exciting especially if you are sneaking around doing it... The problem is once you are in a relationship it's not that exciting anymore, so you better make sure you have something else to talk about...

That's my 2cents anyway 

@PoohC   The First time I heard this part....marrying each others partners.   Makes me wonder, IS both couples still together??? You only mention the one couple???  And Now I also wonder if they KEPT on swinging together??? Are they at least still friends. Please do tell me!!!

BOTH couples are still married. They didn't swing with each other but they still remained friendly as there were kids involved from both sides. 

Again this is a rare accurance

Definitely sounds like a rare occurrence. I mean it's not even easy to find a connection where both people in the couple connect. It doesn't happen often. When it does happen it's explosive ofcourse!

But you're right about how fun the physical interaction seems when you're with a different person and or sneaking around. Turning that into a full on long term relationship. Not for me. 

we have a guy coming over every once in a while, my wife calls him her lover. lol. i know its only joking around, but it does turn me on. she is very sexually attracted to said guy.

People generally blur the lines between sex and love. This happens more often than not. We are conditioned since a young age to believe that sex is an act of love. Therefore women and men fall in love easily with sexual partners. And "swingers" set themselves up for this from the word go. By looking for that spark or connection. 

I personally won't have sex with anyone that I feel that attached to. But what do I know.....

sexysam69 looks like you know allot more then most people do.

It is also difficult to seperate Sex from emotion. In swinging / having sex with other people is just an enjoyable Physical action and has nothing to do with love or emotions.

If My wife had to come home and find me having sex with another lady she wouldn't even think twice about it But if she had to find out I went for coffee or drinks with another woman she would lose her Sh1t, and rightfully so. It is then no longer just a physical thing but now it has become emotional...

I personally feel like there's a difference between a "connection" and love. Damn if I fell in love with everyone I had a connectiom with I'd be such a confused human. I guess it falls down to preference because I feel like if I didn't care about a connection then id just look for any hole to stick my penis into... Or rather a pretty face with a vagina like an escort... Which isn't my thing personally. No judgment to anyone falling in that category. 

I once had a lifestyle partner who in a party got jealous and lost it but I did not know that she had developed feelings for me, as I strongly believe that when that happens you pull the person out of the lifestyle, attachment is the last thing one wants to have however I understand women have a soft side of which they need to have a certain attraction towards you in order for them to sleep with you, of which when it happens frequently attachments do pop up somehow. 

My view is if you not in the mind set that this is only sex and pleasure then falling for someone else will happen, that’s when this becomes dangerous. Iam here just for fun and different experiences. My wife is more than enough for me in that department but trying different things with different people is what we all looking for. 

allow me to add my 2 pennies worth.

A long time ago i spent a lot of time with one particular couple. It was good until the lady invited me for lunch while hubby was away.......well i just ended it there and then.....

As a rule I have always tried to play with just reason behind this is that I found that some single ladies start wanting more then just the sex and in itself is not too bad,however its when they start catching strong feelings and stop playing with other friends and partners then it becomes a problem...The last few months as can be seen by the ladies that have vouched for me,I have started incorporating more single ladies into my play time.... What do you know....one of them has more then just sexual feelings for me,and the crazy thing is I feel pretty much the same about her.. She has stopped playing with other people but says she does not care if I do.....I just see pain and anguish coming out of this...Think I am going back to just couples

This shit happens, I fell madly in love with a man I met on this site. The sex was so good and we matched perfectly. And I guess because we were hooking up on a regular. Eventually its stopped being sex and turned into lovemaking. We dated for a year or so and I was broken when we decided to call it quits. 

But I agree, there's a difference between connection and love. I prefer having sex or playing with someone when there's a connection. The sex is better, doesn't need to be a love relationship but sensual and intimate sessions I can't get enough of. It beats being jack rabbited and used as a prop/blow up doll.

Quote by allaboutfun
Thought this would be a good place to ask..

 Curious as to why you asked the question....

It does happen we had a single guy who we played with a few times go behind my back and try to get with my wife saying he wanted more