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Couples and their profiles

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Are there single guys who know how to behave in the swinging lifestyle?

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Unknown User
Quote by Adonis
I want to have this one as an example "Kan ons jul fotos sien groot asb!" thats the first mail received, what must we make of it, the sender did not chat or mail at any time must we send a mail back waisting our time or what. For intrust it is a couple
I would never send a mail like that and think the receiver must take time to reply. Hope i received a good answer

My reply to that would simply have been:
NO :doh:
Simple as that.....
ash
Sexpert
i dont have an issue if such messages are ignored, however , if someone posts an add saying yes we interested in single males or couples or whatever and i answer that add i would appreciate a thank you but no thank you. i would even appreciate a rude reply as appossed to silence .
bbw_seeker
Forum Virgin
Quote by ash
i dont have an issue if such messages are ignored, however , if someone posts an add saying yes we interested in single males or couples or whatever and i answer that add i would appreciate a thank you but no thank you. i would even appreciate a rude reply as appossed to silence .

yeah, i agree with you ash, some sort of reply is better than none
localcouple1234
Sexlightened
Have to agree with Erotic Naughty. We don't mind sharing our pics with like minded people. BUT-if you mail and ask-and have no pics to share in return-what's the point?
SDM
Sex God
Must say, everything that has been said by the different people on this topic has merit. A lot of it I'm sure we have all thought / realised at one or other point, but being brought up here it reminds one about so much. I especially liked the comment regarding no replies to messages. I am guilty of this myself, if I don't feel the person contacting me is a possible fit, I just move past it, that's wrong of me, especially because it is annoying when it happens to me.
Unknown User
Ok - I've read most of this thread and I think I need to make one comment "Straight male" is NOT THE SAME THING AS "Single male" or "profile with one male member - married or single" And "single male" and "straight male" is not the same thing as "unmarried male" There IS NO OPTION TO SAY "single profile" or "couple profile" is what we are interested in - THOSE options are only available for filtering purposes when you use the SEARCH option in the BROWSE area. Those tick boxes are for you to indicate who you are interested in getting contact from but "one member male profile" is NOT AN OPTION AVAILABLE FOR TICKING or not ticking. AND you shouldn't assume that that option is there, it IS NOT. If I tick "straight male" I am indicating what sort of SEXUAL ORIENTATION I am open to meeting and it has NOTHING to do with the make up of the people/couple/group that is represented by the profile (or for that matter my profile either). A straight male could be part of a couple, a single or part of a gangbang. ALSO just because a guy is bi doesn't mean I as the female part of the couple would exclude the possibility of playing with him - but our profile says my man is straight so the bi guy should know he isn't getting any bi action while playing with us. ALSO on that note - if I tick "bi male" on our profile that DOES NOT MAKE MY MAN OPEN TO BI PLAY, it just means we don't discriminate against a person for being bi and deny him a taste of MY wares because of it. Does that make sense? I think one needs to make the distinction.
georgeous
Casanova
@ LeeEC Thank you for clearing that up. I am in the same boat as i am bi and want to hook up with a couple does not mean that i want to play with the man as well. I selected it on my profile so that whoever reads my profile can see exactly what I'm about. It seems quite funny how many "straight men" look at my profile. What are they trying to say?
Unknown User
Quote by georgeous
.........
It seems quite funny how many "straight men" look at my profile. What are they trying to say?

When I surf profiles, I sometimes use a filter and will probably never see your profile. When I visit the Gallery, Forum and read Story section as it happens more frequently, I see an interesting post or photo and just go to the profile (unfiltered)!
That's when I "look at your profile" - now I have the opportunity to 'connect' the person to the photo or posting!
I'm not sure if you expect an answer - but hey! now I know what you're looking for! wink
Unknown User
Quote by LeeEC
Ok - I've read most of this thread and I think I need to make one comment
"Straight male" is NOT THE SAME THING AS "Single male" or "profile with one male member - married or single"
And "single male" and "straight male" is not the same thing as "unmarried male"
There IS NO OPTION TO SAY "single profile" or "couple profile" is what we are interested in - THOSE options are only available for filtering purposes when you use the SEARCH option in the BROWSE area.
Those tick boxes are for you to indicate who you are interested in getting contact from but "one member male profile" is NOT AN OPTION AVAILABLE FOR TICKING or not ticking. AND you shouldn't assume that that option is there, it IS NOT.
If I tick "straight male" I am indicating what sort of SEXUAL ORIENTATION I am open to meeting and it has NOTHING to do with the make up of the people/couple/group that is represented by the profile (or for that matter my profile either). A straight male could be part of a couple, a single or part of a gangbang.
ALSO just because a guy is bi doesn't mean I as the female part of the couple would exclude the possibility of playing with him - but our profile says my man is straight so the bi guy should know he isn't getting any bi action while playing with us. ALSO on that note - if I tick "bi male" on our profile that DOES NOT MAKE MY MAN OPEN TO BI PLAY, it just means we don't discriminate against a person for being bi and deny him a taste of MY wares because of it.
Does that make sense? I think one needs to make the distinction.

Perhaps then there could be a few extra options on the website to include the 'single' male or female 'genre'? The way I see it, when you create a profile you either create it as a single person or as a couple. Therefore 'straight male' would imply a single guy as your profile will be presented as a single's profile and not a couple's profile? Also, in the search options...if you search for straight male you would mostly get single guys....
But that's a bit besides the point here isn't it? The fact that people can't fill in and review their profiles properly is causing them more trouble than if they took 5minutes to review and correct what they are looking for?
Unknown User
Quote by LeeEC
Ok - I've read most of this thread and I think I need to make one comment
"Straight male" is NOT THE SAME THING AS "Single male" or "profile with one male member - married or single"
And "single male" and "straight male" is not the same thing as "unmarried male"
There IS NO OPTION TO SAY "single profile" or "couple profile" is what we are interested in - THOSE options are only available for filtering purposes when you use the SEARCH option in the BROWSE area.
Those tick boxes are for you to indicate who you are interested in getting contact from but "one member male profile" is NOT AN OPTION AVAILABLE FOR TICKING or not ticking. AND you shouldn't assume that that option is there, it IS NOT.
If I tick "straight male" I am indicating what sort of SEXUAL ORIENTATION I am open to meeting and it has NOTHING to do with the make up of the people/couple/group that is represented by the profile (or for that matter my profile either). A straight male could be part of a couple, a single or part of a gangbang.
ALSO just because a guy is bi doesn't mean I as the female part of the couple would exclude the possibility of playing with him - but our profile says my man is straight so the bi guy should know he isn't getting any bi action while playing with us. ALSO on that note - if I tick "bi male" on our profile that DOES NOT MAKE MY MAN OPEN TO BI PLAY, it just means we don't discriminate against a person for being bi and deny him a taste of MY wares because of it.
Does that make sense? I think one needs to make the distinction.

Perhaps then there could be a few extra options on the website to include the 'single' male or female 'genre'? The way I see it, when you create a profile you either create it as a single person or as a couple. Therefore 'straight male' would imply a single guy as your profile will be presented as a single's profile and not a couple's profile? Also, in the search options...if you search for straight male you would mostly get single guys....
But that's a bit besides the point here isn't it? The fact that people can't fill in and review their profiles properly is causing them more trouble than if they took 5minutes to review and correct what they are looking for?
Unknown User
Quote by Adonis
I want to have this one as an example "Kan ons jul fotos sien groot asb!" thats the first mail received, what must we make of it, the sender did not chat or mail at any time must we send a mail back waisting our time or what. For intrust it is a couple
I would never send a mail like that and think the receiver must take time to reply. Hope i received a good answer

That is really a 'common' mail. I personally NEVER ask to see photos. If the other party feels like sharing their pictures that's awesome, if they don't, then so be it. But the first thing to say shoyld surely be 'Hallo'?
At least people who send those kind of immediately tells you a lot about themselves and gives you all the info you need about them!
georgeous
Casanova
Quote by Gerrie2012
.........
It seems quite funny how many "straight men" look at my profile. What are they trying to say?

When I surf profiles, I sometimes use a filter and will probably never see your profile. When I visit the Gallery, Forum and read Story section as it happens more frequently, I see an interesting post or photo and just go to the profile (unfiltered)!
That's when I "look at your profile" - now I have the opportunity to 'connect' the person to the photo or posting!
I'm not sure if you expect an answer - but hey! now I know what you're looking for! wink
@Gerry2012
:wink: I understand what you saying as i also check profiles mainly from the forum's comments. Only the ones that are
Actively involved in the forums. Like you say to connect better with the person or couple.
playcouple
Casanova
we know quite a few single guys that know how to behave, probably a handful that we have met that dont know and those were never invited back. actually most of the ones that we have met do know how to behave and a few of those have ended up becoming long standing friends that are always welcome and do come over, even just to pop in and say hi over a cup of coffee
Unknown User
Although i am single male , and would love every mail I send to be answered by a nymphomaniac couple giving me GPS co-ordinates to their exact location and begging for my immediate attendance...this is not the site for that. If the males on the site are single by choice(as most claim) then they must realise they are not the same and cannot be handled the same as couples on the site. The trust , honesty and openness which couples need to navigate through the lifestyle with ,should surely earn the couples a slightly loftier perch on the site than us single males who wish to be part of the spoils without the relationship issues that couples need to navigate. We must accept that we are on a swinger site and therefore lower in the pecking order than couples, and also wether we like it or not ,lower than the single females(payback for not letting them vote for so many years lol) . Through respect, good manners, and eating on humble pie(oh and also performing as we claim to able to wink :wink: we can elevate ourselves , and find more than enough willing couples and females on the site. I do not either think that couples can be rude without provocation, just because there is a segment of single males who are giving us a bad reputation. Try and treat each guy on merit.. By generalising all single guys as louts you may miss the experience of a life time. As I don't think it is fair and practical for couples to respond to every mail with a yes or no thanks(not only to single guys but other couples as well) , hope that all members take some time to create their profiles and check that they are a clear reflection of them and their wants/ needs etc. I think it is disrespectful not complete the tickbox section at least. The options have been compiled based on peoples natural and personal preferences. If you are not comfortable with revealing your relationship status, body type etc, then the lifestyle is not for you.(if you really want to experience it, it's as close to honesty you going to get). Single guys: Knowing that we are under scrutiny regarding our conduct, we cannot then claim ignorance if we read INTERESTED IN STRAIGHT MALE, and then choose ignore that they have then stated NO SINGLE MALES!!!! in their about section. So what if it contradicts the tickbox. Wonder what we do if they had not ticked the box , but we happened to notice that they later stated they were eager to fuck as many single men as possible in their "About" section?? Sorry for rambling on, but this topic has so many aspects, and leads to the consequent debate.."what about the single guys behaviour when with the couple?"
NawtyCat
Sexlightened
Quote by Stamina
Manners are something that we are (or should be) taught from a young age. Most of us are well-mannered in every other interaction with people eg work, family, vanilla friends etc Why should it be any different here?
We pride ourselves on the fact that we do read EVERY profile of every person who mails and/or winks at us. We answer all mails and/or winks of profiles which fit our description of whom we will respond to. We only ignore those who blatantly have ignored our request not to be contacted by them.
PS: To Phil, if you have the time, please read our profile and let us know if you find it ambiguous in any way?

I have mailed you in the past (twice)... Both times I was friendly and my messages were basically ice-breakers, requesting the possibility of a chat. Both messages were read (not highlighted in my sent items). Both were ignored...
Um...not sure if you missed the highlighted sentence above? We have since, in our opinion, become "forum" friends and we do chat to you.... wink
Unknown User
Quote by gemini_man
.....
Through respect, good manners, and eating on humble pie(oh and also performing as we claim to able to wink :wink: we can elevate ourselves , and find more than enough willing couples and females on the site.
.....
Sorry for rambling on, but this topic has so many aspects, and leads to the consequent debate.."what about the single guys behaviour when with the couple?"

@Gemini - This is why I love this debate tooo......
It's my experience that couples want single men BUT at their time and leisure. If they add this to their menu they are inundated with winks and PM's and ..... etc. That's why we see the "no single males" in profiles (I'm NOT referring to bi-couples and their preferred needs)
Your 'debate' is on the head - you've nailed it!
Although it was @Phil that started this post - he has in the meantime left the building?
DeonG
Warming the Bed
Phil, though he has left the building has definitely hit the nail on the head. I have been involved in the lifestyle for 12 years now and it is always difficult for a single guy to get anywhere, either with couples or single ladies. When contacting a couple or lady I always check the profile and in my email mention that they "were" looking for a straight male, the reason I say "were" is that you will not get a reply, but when you check up on the profile after a day or so the profile has been adjusted. :censored: If couples or ladies do not set up their profile correctly please expect people to reply, the least you can do in return is reply to the mail. :color: To the couples who do reply, thank you for your honesty and common courtesy kiss @LeeEC, it does not make sense, under your profile when setting up, there are 6 couple selections available if you only want couples (viewable on your profile), as opposed to "straight male" - straight couple, couple with bi-male, couple with bi female, bi couple, gay male couple, gay female couple, I think that covers all couple options and make it easier for the single guys not to reply to a couple who are more specific. If you wanted to play on your own then to avoid bi-males contacting both of you, wouldn't it make more sense just to have your own personal profile? The top 6 options are all for singles, the bottom 6 couples. Just my 2 cents worth :twisted: (considering how much a 2 cent is worth considering it is no longer valid tender wink , probably not going to do much with either the opinions or profiles of the people out there)
Unknown User
I just read the original post, and I must say Amen Phil... I didn't read all the comments, because I know someone would've made the point I'm making as well. I only send personal messages to couples (or ladies)who clearly advertise that they are looking for single men, I make sure to read their bio and ads before I send a message. I'm also quite courteous, never derogatory towards anyone, very friendly etc in my messages... I also ask very nicely in my messages "if you're not interested, no hard feelings, please just let me know." Out of all the messages I've sent out, only one replied... This is turning out to be just as stressful as job-hunting. My point is, why advertise something clearly, then just flat-out ignore someone who responds in a coherent, decent manner? I do have some positive experience though: The other interest I received was from people I never contacted... They were (are) all very polite and nice, and I have nothing but good things to say about them. There, my rant is over. You may now continue with the rest of your day.
Selek
Warming the Bed

One of the life skills I have learned, is to try to see things from the other persons point of view. As a single gentleman, I have spoken to many couples over the years. From what I hear from couples, and especially couples with a very well put together public photo album, they get literally bombarded daily with neanderthal like men who say things like, "would you like to fuck" or "I can help you fuck your wife" or "I can like to fuck your wife properly" 🤣

This type of greeting happening repeatedly, and sometimes daily can really wear the profile administrator down to the point where they may not be so polite when an unexpected decent single guy makes contact. I must be honest, such bombardment would wear my patients thin too. A large part of the problem, I think, is that there is very little actual "reading of profile description" and couples are equally guilty of this. Personally, I love reading profile descriptions because it is easy to identify a quality couple by the way they write about their needs and requirements. One way in which to show respect to a couple or a couple to a single guy, is if you make first contact, start with saying "Hello Bob, or Sally or BobSallyCouple. Using a profiles name in ones greeting can really improve how the message is received. Greetings like "Hi, we loved your profile, would you like to chat - fullstop. This looks like a copy and paste greeting. As a single guy and I get this type of greeting from couples all the time. Dale Carnegie said "The most beautiful sound a person will ever hear, is the sound of their name"