Blocked profiles

This is not a rant, just a point to ponder!

I have, on occasion, tried to open a profile only to find I have been blocked and warned not to query it as I will face the might of the mods or some other hidden force. The profile I was trying to look at was new to me and I have, to my recollection, never interacted with the owner of the profile.

My first reaction is WTF but then after thinking about it I accept that the person/persons had their reason and here in lies my point. 

I for one would like to know what caused the blocking. 

I believe the owners of a profile can choose to block profiles they don't want contact from(Not sure if this is the case but I recall reading something like that). If that is the case then say so. "Sorry, you have been blocked as you do not fit one or more criteria." If I have passed a comment which offends, say so. "Sorry, you have been blocked as your comment sucked." I for one would like the opportunity to apologize if it is the latter.

I realize there are individuals that take rejection badly and that it is hard to please all but I believe that most of the members here are stand up folk and can handle the truth and that the community can only grow from strength to strength if we all communicate our desires and are given an opportunity to right our wrongs.

Over, standing by on SH

I agree. I have been blocked just by viewing a profile that appeared as a match in my feed.

I didnt even message or wink. It happens but i choose not to waste my energy by dwelling on it.

I must agree with the OP and the above we do not dwell too much on being blocked by anyone as it is a personal choice,it does come across as extremely rude and somewhat arrogant when you get blocked for simply viewing a profile or liking a public image.

There is no way to judge whether a profile would be a match without actually viewing the for one do not bother to go into anyone's gallery if your description clearly states "same race only" or " same ethnic group" or "under 30's only"  or "no couple's"etc etc...or any other requirement where we clearly do not match.....but we will only know that by viewing your profile.

If our profiles do not match (as recommended on SH) then surely,if you choose to block our profile then at least there should be an option to let the other party know Why.

So much has been spoken of how decent the people are within the lifestyle and how communication is of utmost importance and how people should be treated with respect yet some choose to act in a rather disrespectfull manner with a simple act of blocking another profile...unless its warranted of course......cos really....some profiles probably deserve being blocked.

Without coming across as overly sensitive in this instance....perhaps a simple dropdown menu with options to choose from when you block a profile

-not a match/not interested

-undue harassment/rude comments

-profile incomplete/no pics etc

-non responsive to email

Perhaps...just perhaps....it won't make the people you are blocking think that you a total arrogant ass with a really shitty attitude.....

Just a thought

Oh my my fingers is itching again... Lol so bare with me. 

We have on this site a vast amount of different people and tastes. Anyone who is willing to sift through the profiles will find a few matches. And will have fun. Bitching about it is not going to get you the attention you want .

If someone blocks you there's a reason... Move on . If everyone blocks you ..... Well sadly there is also a reason....... Work on it. 

Funny observation I have made is the " we demand A, B or C" attitude from the single men these days . 

I doubt it is going to get you anywhere boys 

Hugs and kisses

Sam 

Hi sexySam,

You might be right...but then again, maybe not.

Maybe I will look at it this way: There are 50 000 SH members in Gauteng alone. If 45 000 block me, I need only concern myself with 5000 members; still a lifetime quest to work through..and at OOM's age, lifetimes r not that long

Lmfao...  Well at least the " Oom" has a sense of humour. And according to your vouches you already had success. 

May the odds be ever in your favour .

My thoughts are that a person at least needs to know that they got blocked and in my view it is only the "adult thing to do" to tell a person why he/she has been blocked. A simple site generated message, telling someone that he/she has been blocked with a reason that is completed by the blocker would suffice, with as little or dew detail deemed necessary by the blocker. Let's face it, this site is becoming endlessly childish because of issues such as this.

Let me explain from personal experience (something that happened to me 2 days ago):

I was in the pool, chatting merrily. A "friend" came on and I greeted her AFTER SHE GREETED ME. We chatted for a while in the main pool and I decided to have a peek at her profile (appqrently she had new pictures on). I haven't seen her or looked at her profile for a while. It seemed as if I was blocked after I selected "view profile". I checked my blocked list to remove her, thinking that I accidentally blocked her. We were, afterall, friends and chatting like there is no tomorrow in the pool! When I did not find her there, I mentioned to her in the main pool that we seem to be blocked from each other and that it wasn't a block from my side, thereby indicating that it must be a site glitch. She then got in a short stab, saying that she is done with drama (WTF) and REPORTED ME FOR CONTACTING HER IN THE POOL and for asking if it was some kind of a glitch!!! Please bear in mind that I greeted after SHE greeted first, etc. Based on this, I got a 24 hour chat ban. Let me not even get started on how fair this was and on what I think of her now (In retrospect: I do perceive this as luck and a bullet dodged, seeing that she is also a bit of the town bicycle and even though this is a swing site, moat of us have standards. Also, she has absolutely no discression and seems to be flaunting her sexual encounters and the real names of people that she had them with, to whomever is willing to waste their time on chatting with her.)

So in short: I think the site is lacking in terms of proper indication and procedures about what should be done when you are blocked. There should be a place to contest it, even if it is through a site admin, to find out if it is an accidental or deliberate block. I have been contacted by people that I have blocked by accident and it happened to me too in the past.

I furthermore feel that there is no transparancy surrounding when someone is banned or kicked or just warned, and people seem to be using all of this as a weapon of sorts to get others banned. How childish on a supposedly adult site!!

Morning Everyone.

Although I am shown as a newbie now, since I only rejoined a week ago once again, I am not, so please bear with me. 

Finding out you have been blocked must feel like a slap to one`s face I am sure, specially if you gotten along from your point of view. And YES, I have also been blocked a few times in my previous profile.

What we all must realize is that most people are not really honest and some do feel bad being honest in saying directly to another person to NOT make contact as they do not really feel like they would get along,Or that you are starting to become a nuisance.

Thus blocking another person without saying anything.

I know that other sites do have the options of allowing you to sent a little fake note saying sorry but no thanks sorta thing. 

Myself, I think I am way better off without a fake person in my life than having that person sending cheerful fake mails or notes. There is so many new people to get to know that the few that blocks you is of no any one of you that is blocked suddenly without a reasonable reason want to continue chatting or mailing that person, I know I would not want to.

@bob969  I have found over time that if you are *blocked* from a profile before EVER making contact with that profile, it is not YOU as a person they have blocked, but more likely a site filter that they have activated to block anyone from viewing or making contact that does not fall in their profile criteria.

@amethyst  Well there goes my one theory, but I still remain the above writing to bob969. You, I feel have the right attitude towards being *blocked*

@unicorn-hunter  I like your suggestions.  But why does one have to block an obvious open to public profile....like I said nervous and not really bravely honest people goes by this option just to block.....to my thinking anyway.

@sexysam69  Now this is a honesty I like and such true words as well. I will not talk about pushy single men who will never learn. I myself do not block people I tend to just ignore the mails/flirts of people who does NOT take the time to read a written the end they feel I am a douche and rude...but who cares ..... Me???  NOT really.

@The_Hedonist   Yeah well, we all have to die sometime, why not die while browsing sexy profiles....Just saying....and smiling this side of the computer.

@Pierott-Pierrette   Sadly it has now happened and Yes, I am sure you do not have a favourite thought towards the other profile who blocked you or got you banned from site for 24 hours. You should also know that you may question the actions of a Mod by writing a complaint to the site managers and THEY do have access to go back to view the chat room to verify your complaint. As for blocking people who start private chats without consent, man, just thinking about it, I am sure there will not be a profile on SH that frequence the chat rooms, that will not be banned for a few days ever!!!  All I can really say is you  guys are way off better knowing what a douche certain people can be.

Quote by sexysam69
Lmfao...  Well at least the " Oom" has a sense of humour. And according to your vouches you already had success. 
May the odds be ever in your favour .

Perhaps, if I am ever, for any reason, in Sannieshof  (heaven knows what reason that could be), or if you are in Sodom, we can meet for a block of coffee.  I am more than willing to share my sense of humour, and everything else...

Your's 

Oompie

@PussinBoots, I ain't dead yet, neither in spirit, nor in body! And judging by your profile, neither are you....maybe sometime I can get into your........boots!

@ The _Hedonist  nope , we both are *op en wakker en spring lewendig*   but heed this warning..... if ever you come near my old boots...I might allow you to wear them sporting a nice thong....and be ready to submit to a Old Domina....he, he, he, (evil cackling)  oh,and I never switch!!!!  I think  read somewhere you are looking for a mentor to become a Dominant. LMAO.

It definitely feels like a slap in the face to be blocked without even interacting - no reason given, just blocked by someone, never to be reversed. I am even thinking of canceling my subscription and deleting my profile.

It's not necessary to take such drastic steps because of some people's preferences. I am an Administrator on a group and I get to decide if I 'approve' or 'deny' an application. I have come across a couple of profiles blocked to me - I have no reason why - but then have the pleasure of denying them, mainly because I can't see if they're suitable. . This is definitely their loss and a little satisfying to me! 

Our profile clearly states what we require as far as playmates go namely bi top males as Mrs gets turned on watching a well equipped bloke do me.

What can be simpler to understand. 

But we still get straight blokes replying and trying to insist they actually what we need.

That's when the block button comes into play.

But before we resort to blocking we explain why we not interested.

If they continue we block them.

Our view is simple regarding blocking. 

We are more than happy to chat to anyone at anytime. When we are engaging with those whom become aggressive and pushy the block button comes into play. We chat to those whom are not what we are looking for, because............ as time goes on our tastes and wants evolve. But when a line is crossed then we dont want to be harassed by people whom clearly refuse to accept our wants and likes. 

It quite simple (guys, girls or couples), READ the profile and odds of blocking decreases. 

Secondly, we are continuously messaged, in very rude, crude and vulgar ways, hence blocking. 

PS............ especially to the single guys (with or without consent), sending a "friend request" when you have never messaged, chatted or engaged is just lazy. This is not a popularity contest. 

Quote by Farsin
Our view is simple regarding blocking. 
We are more than happy to chat to anyone at anytime. When we are engaging with those whom become aggressive and pushy the block button comes into play. We chat to those whom are not what we are looking for, because............ as time goes on our tastes and wants evolve. But when a line is crossed then we dont want to be harassed by people whom clearly refuse to accept our wants and likes. 
It quite simple (guys, girls or couples), READ the profile and odds of blocking decreases. 
Secondly, we are continuously messaged, in very rude, crude and vulgar ways, hence blocking. 
PS............ especially to the single guys (with or without consent), sending a "friend request" when you have never messaged, chatted or engaged is just lazy. This is not a popularity contest. 

 Yes the automated friend request without any form of introduction is generally ignored, if they get pushy block is used.

yes 

We honestly don't care if we get blocked and we also don't care what the reason is. Its their loss not ours, and they probably did us a favour. 

The way we see it is, we didn't get into the Lifestyle So that people would like us (We already like "Us") and we are not doing this to make somebody else happy or for their pleasure only (This is all to make "Us" Happy)

People shouldn't care why people don't like you or what the problem is, remember it's their problem. Rather just carry on looking for the people that will like you.

I have taken the same response with Time Wasters. If somebody doesn't pitch for a playdate, i don't let it anger me. If you carry on about it and let it consume you then that person has wasted your time Twice. I just make a note so that I don't give them another opportunity to do it again.

im not sure why some of you are concerned that you are blocked..why waste energy on somebody that clearly does not want to inter act with you...i dont give it a 2nd thought

i think we some times forget that we are all from different walks of life...so more wealthy....some more educated ....some more polite ..the list goes on...and i think we all make the mistake from time to time that we are all on the same social level....we are not

Quote by Pierrot_Pierrette

My thoughts are that a person at least needs to know that they got blocked and in my view it is only the "adult thing to do" to tell a person why he/she has been blocked. A simple site generated message, telling someone that he/she has been blocked with a reason that is completed by the blocker would suffice, with as little or dew detail deemed necessary by the blocker. Let's face it, this site is becoming endlessly childish because of issues such as this.

Let me explain from personal experience (something that happened to me 2 days ago):

I was in the pool, chatting merrily. A "friend" came on and I greeted her AFTER SHE GREETED ME. We chatted for a while in the main pool and I decided to have a peek at her profile (appqrently she had new pictures on). I haven't seen her or looked at her profile for a while. It seemed as if I was blocked after I selected "view profile". I checked my blocked list to remove her, thinking that I accidentally blocked her. We were, afterall, friends and chatting like there is no tomorrow in the pool! When I did not find her there, I mentioned to her in the main pool that we seem to be blocked from each other and that it wasn't a block from my side, thereby indicating that it must be a site glitch. She then got in a short stab, saying that she is done with drama (WTF) and REPORTED ME FOR CONTACTING HER IN THE POOL and for asking if it was some kind of a glitch!!! Please bear in mind that I greeted after SHE greeted first, etc. Based on this, I got a 24 hour chat ban. Let me not even get started on how fair this was and on what I think of her now (In retrospect: I do perceive this as luck and a bullet dodged, seeing that she is also a bit of the town bicycle and even though this is a swing site, moat of us have standards. Also, she has absolutely no discression and seems to be flaunting her sexual encounters and the real names of people that she had them with, to whomever is willing to waste their time on chatting with her.)

So in short: I think the site is lacking in terms of proper indication and procedures about what should be done when you are blocked. There should be a place to contest it, even if it is through a site admin, to find out if it is an accidental or deliberate block. I have been contacted by people that I have blocked by accident and it happened to me too in the past.

I furthermore feel that there is no transparancy surrounding when someone is banned or kicked or just warned, and people seem to be using all of this as a weapon of sorts to get others banned. How childish on a supposedly adult site!!

In my experience everyone who says they dont want drama is the cause of drama, both here, in relationships and in the workplace.

Quote by Pierrot_Pierrette

My thoughts are that a person at least needs to know that they got blocked and in my view it is only the "adult thing to do" to tell a person why he/she has been blocked. A simple site generated message, telling someone that he/she has been blocked with a reason that is completed by the blocker would suffice, with as little or dew detail deemed necessary by the blocker. Let's face it, this site is becoming endlessly childish because of issues such as this.

Let me explain from personal experience (something that happened to me 2 days ago):

I was in the pool, chatting merrily. A "friend" came on and I greeted her AFTER SHE GREETED ME. We chatted for a while in the main pool and I decided to have a peek at her profile (appqrently she had new pictures on). I haven't seen her or looked at her profile for a while. It seemed as if I was blocked after I selected "view profile". I checked my blocked list to remove her, thinking that I accidentally blocked her. We were, afterall, friends and chatting like there is no tomorrow in the pool! When I did not find her there, I mentioned to her in the main pool that we seem to be blocked from each other and that it wasn't a block from my side, thereby indicating that it must be a site glitch. She then got in a short stab, saying that she is done with drama (WTF) and REPORTED ME FOR CONTACTING HER IN THE POOL and for asking if it was some kind of a glitch!!! Please bear in mind that I greeted after SHE greeted first, etc. Based on this, I got a 24 hour chat ban. Let me not even get started on how fair this was and on what I think of her now (In retrospect: I do perceive this as luck and a bullet dodged, seeing that she is also a bit of the town bicycle and even though this is a swing site, moat of us have standards. Also, she has absolutely no discression and seems to be flaunting her sexual encounters and the real names of people that she had them with, to whomever is willing to waste their time on chatting with her.)

So in short: I think the site is lacking in terms of proper indication and procedures about what should be done when you are blocked. There should be a place to contest it, even if it is through a site admin, to find out if it is an accidental or deliberate block. I have been contacted by people that I have blocked by accident and it happened to me too in the past.

I furthermore feel that there is no transparancy surrounding when someone is banned or kicked or just warned, and people seem to be using all of this as a weapon of sorts to get others banned. How childish on a supposedly adult site!!

Absolutely agree 200%. A person should at least be asked for reason why they are blocking someone so the other person at least knows why, it's really just common decency! Also agree a person should be able to contest or query a block to be sure it wasn't done by accident as has happened that when the site freezes on my phone, the next thing I know the block button has been pressed somehow when the site unfreezes.

Quote by haveusbc

im not sure why some of you are concerned that you are blocked..why waste energy on somebody that clearly does not want to inter act with you...i dont give it a 2nd thought

i think we some times forget that we are all from different walks of life...so more wealthy....some more educated ....some more polite ..the list goes on...and i think we all make the mistake from time to time that we are all on the same social level....we are not

Return the favour - someone block you, you block them straight back and be done with them.

To be blocked is all good we have reasons for doing things and the right to block a profile my gripe is being blocked by inderviualsbut they still view our profiles they blocked really that sucks or you are just a pervert sorry but that's it in a nutshell you guys that block and still check out our profile get a life

We can't view blocked profiles not those that have blocked us or those we have blocked! So either the site is sending out false views or someone has looked at a pic in gallery.

Quote by amethyst

I agree. I have been blocked just by viewing a profile that appeared as a match in my feed.

I didnt even message or wink. It happens but i choose not to waste my energy by dwelling on it.

I agree I have also been blocked by some and then after some time they view your profile and pics but then you can't block them

For us it's very simple, our profile is open to view for anyone. But if you fall in our no - no category and then like, comment or message, then you can't read or comprehend so we assist you by adding you to our block list.

Yes