Hi all
I am 30, young and married.
I think of sex all the time, where I look and things I plan.
My wife does not like having sex very often, but I cant stop thinking about it. Whenver I get a chance I go to strip clubs or a random affair. I dont want her to find out, but REALLY REALL want to have fun.
Any advice?
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confused with a Dilemma
Seriously guys??!!!
If you want to make HER want sex more often then you have to make it awesome for her.....
You need to stop thinking about SEX and start thinking about SEX FOR HER....
Ok, so why do you like sex? Coz it feels awesome right? So if she feels awesome when you have sex with her she will want it more and more and eventually, she'll be like me... 3 times I day if I can get it (5 times yesterday, 2 so far today and well today isn't done yet :twisted: )
Ok - so how do you get your wife all sexed up?
First you need to arm yourself with info - you need to get online and research the physiology of women and where all the good 'spots' are on and in her body.
Then you need to study her: First there are two types of women generally when it comes to "switchin them on"
the first kind are the romance types: they melt at flowers and chocolates and candlelight etc.
The Second are the seduction types; they want to feel sexy and desired and gorgeous in your eyes.
If you simply wnat to get fucked... that is pretty much what she's likely to say to you... 
You can't think that just coz you're married you don't have to make an effort dude.
So once you've figured out if shes a romance or a seduction type you need to proceed on your mission to "romance her" or "Seduce her" (see next post for the tips and tricks)
You need to rememebr that - If you enjoy it, you want to do it more.
Same goes for women - if she loves the experience she'll want to do it more and more and by the way - "the more sex you get the more sex you want" is ABSOLUTELY true, so once you start her up it will be very difficult to slow her down...
:twisted:
LeeEC
You can't think that just coz you're married you don't have to make an effort dude.
So once you've figured out if shes a romance or a seduction type you need to proceed on your mission to "romance her" or "Seduce her" (see next post for the tips and tricks)
You need to rememebr that - If you enjoy it, you want to do it more.
Same goes for women - if she loves the experience she'll want to do it more and more and by the way - "the more sex you get the more sex you want" is ABSOLUTELY true, so once you start her up it will be very difficult to slow her down...
:twisted:
LeeEC Well here is the thing - and you're going to kick yourself when you hear it - you don't have any control over what other people do, you only have control over their REACTION to what you do... and you control that by changing your behaviour toward them and then they react differently.
Simple.
So if you want someone to behave a certain way toward you, demanding, pleading or freaking ins't going to change anything but changing what you do will get a different reaction.
So you want her to want sex - you gotta make her want it p start with the obvious - what makes you want it? Well it's an awesome feeling! So how do you get her to want it? Make it feel fucking awesome for her...
How do you make it awesome for her then? Simple: figure out where her "buttons" are!
you need to figure out if her buttons are more in the "romance area" of her brain or the "seduction" area of her brain.
So do a few tests:
- be romantic -pull out all the stops, do all the corny stuff you think is silly (or maybe justs bit of corny to see if you're going in the right direction (I can give you suggestions if this will help), and see how willingly she puts out ...
IMPORTANT NOTE: The romance must continue right up until the climaxing moment and in fact if this test gets you a happy ending, you should be sure to at the very least hold her hand while you not off to sleep after (VERY NB!!)
OR
- be seductive - pull out all the stops, naughty notes in her pockets, call her in the ,middle of the day and ask her if shes feeling sexy because you thin she should feel sexy. Tell her she makes you horny. Buy her sexy crotchless panties and ask her to wear them to work, and see where that gets you... If you're well on your way to your final destination, DO NOT let up with the physical feedback guys! Stay in the moment and make sure she believes that she is the sexiest woman on the planet right up until you blow your load.... If you really want results with the "seduce me" type of woman, encourage her to tell you her fantasies and NEVER mock them.
mockery = cock blockery!
Actually that's a very good saying to remember guys.
In general - if you want a truly sexy woman in your life the way to get her is to TREAT HER LIKE SHE IS SEXY!! It's like a self fullfilling prophecy - try it you'll like it!
If you want her to adore you - and fulfill all your wildest dreams, try doing the same for her...
Of course there will always be some women who will NEVER go for the swinging idea but at the very least you will have the most awesome frikken sex life you could possibly have with her.
P.S. Disclaimer: There are a small percentage of women who have psychological issues around sex, some from traumatic experiences. If you try the above method and you get nowhere, I recommend seeking professional advice for your ladies' troubled mind and heart. Every woman DESERVES to have an amazing and satisfying sex life and it's the least you can do for someone you love.
Simple.
So if you want someone to behave a certain way toward you, demanding, pleading or freaking ins't going to change anything but changing what you do will get a different reaction.
So you want her to want sex - you gotta make her want it p start with the obvious - what makes you want it? Well it's an awesome feeling! So how do you get her to want it? Make it feel fucking awesome for her...
How do you make it awesome for her then? Simple: figure out where her "buttons" are!
you need to figure out if her buttons are more in the "romance area" of her brain or the "seduction" area of her brain.
So do a few tests:
- be romantic -pull out all the stops, do all the corny stuff you think is silly (or maybe justs bit of corny to see if you're going in the right direction (I can give you suggestions if this will help), and see how willingly she puts out ...
IMPORTANT NOTE: The romance must continue right up until the climaxing moment and in fact if this test gets you a happy ending, you should be sure to at the very least hold her hand while you not off to sleep after (VERY NB!!)
OR
- be seductive - pull out all the stops, naughty notes in her pockets, call her in the ,middle of the day and ask her if shes feeling sexy because you thin she should feel sexy. Tell her she makes you horny. Buy her sexy crotchless panties and ask her to wear them to work, and see where that gets you... If you're well on your way to your final destination, DO NOT let up with the physical feedback guys! Stay in the moment and make sure she believes that she is the sexiest woman on the planet right up until you blow your load.... If you really want results with the "seduce me" type of woman, encourage her to tell you her fantasies and NEVER mock them.
mockery = cock blockery!
Actually that's a very good saying to remember guys.
In general - if you want a truly sexy woman in your life the way to get her is to TREAT HER LIKE SHE IS SEXY!! It's like a self fullfilling prophecy - try it you'll like it!
If you want her to adore you - and fulfill all your wildest dreams, try doing the same for her...
Of course there will always be some women who will NEVER go for the swinging idea but at the very least you will have the most awesome frikken sex life you could possibly have with her.
P.S. Disclaimer: There are a small percentage of women who have psychological issues around sex, some from traumatic experiences. If you try the above method and you get nowhere, I recommend seeking professional advice for your ladies' troubled mind and heart. Every woman DESERVES to have an amazing and satisfying sex life and it's the least you can do for someone you love.
Quote by Gerrie2012
@LeeEC
Ok, this is good advice!
So true ..... for things to change I must change! Hey?
How to make sure she enjoys sex...
Well if you think about the best BJ you ever had, there were, I'm sure, particular moves and strokes and speeds and angles that really 'did' it for you right?
Well the same is true for women.
I'm going to speak a little from experience now:
I lost my virginity at about 16 to a long term, much beloved boyfriend, who, I believe was pretty much at the same stage (judging from his reaction to our first, unsuccessful and very unpleasant attempt).
Orgasms didn't come to me until I was about 19... (how awful huh?)
and then totally by accident too.
So I finally figured out that playing with my clit and then of course the regular (obsessive) use of a hand-held massager opened the door to regular, if high pitched and overly intense, orgasms ... well sort of.
Sex with penetration continued to be, while more pleasant and sort of fun in a recreational way, distinctly unsatisfactory.
Then I met a boy who loved to lick clit and I experienced my very first real, earth shattering orgasm.
Only to chase after the elusive thing for about 4 more years til I met my husband... at 29!! THIRTEEN YEARS boys!
THAT is how long it took to figure out sex for me! And it took someone who was willing to let me use him as a bit of a playground in order to get it right, I finally figured out that if I used a toy against my clit DURING sex, I could achieve mind-blowing orgasms that surpassed and destroyed all previous concepts of the definition of "orgasm".
This kind of sex and climax simply could not be reproduced using toys, friends, I NEEDED my husband to make it work.. though he still doesn't seem to 'get' how essential he is to this process...
Then to both our delight, somehow this process, and the position - necessary because of a back op the hubby had, but which has come to be our favorite (cowgirl I believe it's called) - which serendipitously presented just the right angle for this aligning of the stars... I DISCOVERED MY G-SPOT!!
I can not begin to tell you how surprising and awesome it is to discover such a thing.
And amazingly, once I found it, is was so easy to find again. I started exploding almost every time we had sex... and for someone who didn't cum at all for the first 3 years of her sexually active life.... well I can only say that this man I call husband is my hero.
***
So what is my point... it's a journey for her, it takes time and effort, but when it pays off it pays off in the most spectacular way possible.... Don't believe me? Ask my husband! :twisted:
If you are her lover then it's your JOB to discover the things that make her melt, what to say to her and what to do to her to get her attention, keep it and make her respond to your sexual advances... maybe start by thinking about how you got her into the sack that very first time
Blowjobs and Licks
LeeEC
Blowjobs and Licks
LeeEC Lee is giving some graet advice! But also one thing I found that blocked me for a few years of having high sexdrive and simply just not being intrested in sex was my kids. The were (still are) very young but have become little less needing of mom giving me some me time to rest out.
Also, as exciting as quickies are, if that's all your getting sex simply does not feel worth it! Heard the saying once that to turn on a guy is as simply as flicking the light swich but for a lady it is as if having to light a thousand candles! And it is true, my hubby totally believes in that foreplay starts with the good morning kiss. Believe me since he started a new job and we've been able to have more time for each other the whole day long foreplay, even just a sexy wink, makes for awsome sex in the evening!
People always attract my attention when they are genuine!
Sharing real life experience when giving advice and tips, really gets me wet with anticipation.
Especially in this lifestyle its key to share real life experiences instead of just giving advice or sharing opinions
@LeeEC
Thanks, I'm becoming an avid student of making sure she enjoys sex!! LOL
