Let's forget a moment about one on ones and all the other issues about swinging (from one tree to another and blah blah blah) and the 'wham bam' stuff.
Just for a moment think what would be the best way to start with friendly action (sex) in the lifestyle. Would a MMF OR MFF (here I'm only referring to 2 people - same sex - working the other opposite sex to a high) be the better option to start a friendship? I'm asking this because the majority couples on SH are apparently looking at a FFM scenario.
Personally - not because I'm wearing my caveman hat, but thinking cap instead - I think a MMF for starters would be the best approach, because it's much more fun / satisfying to bring the lady to a high (multiple highs?) than the other way (MFF) around? Men love to work together and this way of (men) bonding is much more long term, especially if they are very skilled in their teamwork! One couple on this site - I love their stories in the Story section (you know whom I'm referring to?) - are a good example of this. Generally speaking off course, because I pick up that they have moved to higher levels over the years!
What do you think?
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Where (With what...) should we start?
I know I will be stoned for saying this, but I am going there...so keep your stones ready!!!
I know that a few ladies are the one`s who initiated the *swingers lifestyle*.BUT they are JUST a few.
Mostly it is the gents who does the initiating of *what if`s*.....
Most ladies may disagree with me ,and will never admit to it, but they joined to *keep Hubby* happy,thus for them they would always go FFM first time out,as this is MOST males fantasies.
The ladies then realize that there is a world of undiscovered sex and orgasms they never had,and then the MMF action starts.
Of course there are issues to overcome...jealousies, body views of yourself ,of feeling like an inadequate lover, like we all know already.
But once hooked, the ladies enjoy all the yes MMF is heavenly to have.
Now I am not talking about men like *Voyeur * here, he is like a few other gents here ,who loves the *cuckolding scenario`s*.
I am talking about your average swinging couple.
You may feel free to disagree.
Sex God
Whatever anyone could say on this intriguing topic Gerrie has brought up, will in it's own way have merit.
Everybody is different, everyone enjoys different things. What PIB said is so very true. (keep hubby happy)
To answer your question Gerrie (what would be best) I would say (this is MY opinion) that any man worth his salt, should let the woman guide the decision. I for one, believe that when the woman is at an ultimate high, I benefit just as much.
Well this is a heavy one to answer, but let me start at our begining
We both started off talking about our own fantasy. Mine been MMF (believe it or not) and Joys been FFM.
Well me been the gentelman I am (again believe it or not) gave in to my wife fantasy. We went for the FFM thing. It did not work for us Joy got very cross as the other lady tried to cut her out. And yes we did have the secret word which had to be given if something went wrong. Joy gave the secret word and I stopped. And walked out. Well needless to say we never saw the lady again.
So Joy and I sat down spoke about, Joy said the lady let her feel as if she (Joy) was a third wheel and that she was just a third wheel. So then we decided to go the MMF. My fantasy well.
Well I enjoyed it all the way, but at a point the guy did just what the lady did he cut me out. Which to me was not a problem. It gave me time to recover. But Joy hit the roof. And said it is not right that the guy cut me out. On matter what I said she would not lesson.
Needles to say that was the end of 3soms for a long while. Then the subject came up again I asked her if we can try it again. And again we had a FFM needles to say desastor hit again. Then tried MMF and again Joy got upset. That is why we go for cpls. We find if each one of us has something to do then it is great. Maybe now and then she will let me invite a man in for a 3som.
well that is our story
Joyrider
PS; it was great with FFM for me i could see how long i could hold out and see if i could pleasure both of them. which i could (jakkals prys sy eie stert)
We both find the idea of 3sums less intimidating that full on playing with couples.
And as I am bi, both MMF and FFM excite me :twisted:
But the reason we like the idea of threesomes so much is because we love watching eachother. Our first threesome was a FFM, and goodness me was it phenomenal! Both K and I took turns pleasuring her, and then I watched him fuck her.
Wow! What an amazing turn on! The idea of watching each other's faces as I(he) am(is) being fucked by another person is a huge turn on!
PIB, K says I intiated that threesome ;)
We like being a part of each other's sexual experiences, even if its just watching (and playing with myself while I watch)... :twisted:
;)
C
To be honest (believe it or not) I am also confused by the FFM trend... I expect PIB might be correct - but the best way to find out for sure is to ask people.
When it comes to 3sums; we (Matt & I, as a couple together) have really only ever done the MFM thing and with more of a cuckoldry flavour than a 3sum flavour.
I think most single women in our area on the site are fakes (and the few who are not, have more options themselves than they know what to do with) - which is why despite being open to the FFM experience we've never managed to find a single female to join us.
Couple play is just very different with very different parameters and considerations... 3sums or experiences involving only 3 people are just a really different experience from straight swap/swinging. Our intro to swinging was couple play with some close friends (years before we discovered that there with thousands of people out there doing what we were doing!), although both of us had been pretty wild before we got together and were pretty open about our previous activities with each other when we got together (one of the main reasons we got together was that we didn't fear judgement from each other actually), so talking about the idea of swinging was actually quite easy for us.
Personally I'm not as keen on a FFM than a MFM, but that is mainly because I KNOW how women think about sex and there are very few truly liberated and open-minded women who REALLY can see sex in a more 'male' way, by this I mean that men see sex as fitting in two separate boxes AND and the larger majority of women, (on an intrinsic biological level) regardless of how they act or what they say, see sex as inextricably and exclusively intertwined with love.
On the other hand I know for a fact (from experience) that FFM can work because the women involved can connect on a very intimate level too, so it really just all boils down, for me anyway, to the individual you are proposing I invite home to play with me and the hubby
Not very helpful... sorry
When it comes to 3sums; we (Matt & I, as a couple together) have really only ever done the MFM thing and with more of a cuckoldry flavour than a 3sum flavour.
I think most single women in our area on the site are fakes (and the few who are not, have more options themselves than they know what to do with) - which is why despite being open to the FFM experience we've never managed to find a single female to join us.
Couple play is just very different with very different parameters and considerations... 3sums or experiences involving only 3 people are just a really different experience from straight swap/swinging. Our intro to swinging was couple play with some close friends (years before we discovered that there with thousands of people out there doing what we were doing!), although both of us had been pretty wild before we got together and were pretty open about our previous activities with each other when we got together (one of the main reasons we got together was that we didn't fear judgement from each other actually), so talking about the idea of swinging was actually quite easy for us.
Personally I'm not as keen on a FFM than a MFM, but that is mainly because I KNOW how women think about sex and there are very few truly liberated and open-minded women who REALLY can see sex in a more 'male' way, by this I mean that men see sex as fitting in two separate boxes AND and the larger majority of women, (on an intrinsic biological level) regardless of how they act or what they say, see sex as inextricably and exclusively intertwined with love.
On the other hand I know for a fact (from experience) that FFM can work because the women involved can connect on a very intimate level too, so it really just all boils down, for me anyway, to the individual you are proposing I invite home to play with me and the hubby
Not very helpful... sorry
I think that maybe you are being too sensitive and I dont mean it in a bad way
Threesomes, as in our case mmf, is such a lovely experiance.
We have never had any real bad experiances, except a guy with a 28 cm cock, he pushed it in after I did all the foreplay, shot his load, got dressed and left
Most our playmates come back for years, currently she has 2 lovers that have been popping in for 5 and the other 12 years
Not interested in foursomes, moresomes etc, tried it and as you said to complicated and hard work. We are there after all for the fun of it and not to set records or such things
Quote by Gerrie2012
Just for a moment think what would be the best way to start with friendly action (sex) in the lifestyle. Would a MMF OR MFF (here I'm only referring to 2 people - same sex - working the other opposite sex to a high) be the better option to start a friendship? I'm asking this because the majority couples on SH are apparently looking at a FFM scenario.
For us I think was good to start with a couple and slowly, only same room fun. But we each have something specific that we want to try and singles would work best so that the 4th person are not left out of the fun.
The FFM senario is both of ours, mostly since I (and yes we are of the few were the lady instigated joining the lifestyle) want to see hubby with another lady....almost a reverse *cockhold* situation.
MMF simply because we kinda want an extra *real* cock and not a dildo for a dp
but I am picky and need to at least find a gent I feel comfortable with. (due to no need to discuss own mind blocks still being overcome) But I think the forum will be the first peeps to know when we have success! lol
Mrs E
Quote by LeeEC
To be honest (believe it or not) I am also confused by the FFM trend... I expect PIB might be correct - but the best way to find out for sure is to ask people.
............
On the other hand I know for a fact (from experience) that FFM can work because the women involved can connect on a very intimate level too, so it really just all boils down, for me anyway, to the individual you are proposing I invite home to play with me and the hubby
Not very helpful... sorry
This cannot be under estimated! The bold part of the sentence - that's why I can relate to a little bit of cuckoldry!
