What puts you immediately of a profile or somebody contacting you ?

I am very sure our longwinded profile description puts many people off. But hey it is what it is. Not everybody is

compatible and thankfully there is a playdate for all shapes ,sizes and preferences :-)

Here is some of ours:-

People contacting us without reading our profile .

Sending us a computer generated message

People with incomplete profiles

Then there are the men with seriously angry,unfriendly face pics they send you. Smile please.

We are a straight couple. Men sending us pics wearing womens panties. Yuk !! Very off putting for us.

Any genitalia pics over the toilet

Sending us close ups of your very crazy looking eyes or pulling faces

Crude people and their crude forum names. Transvaal naaiers of pietpiel don't do it for us

And our pet hate. People offering to help us. We are not needy looking for help. Mutual fun is what we are about.

Fire away

Very well said - as to incomplete profiles and no pics either, how does one even know it's a true profile. 

Quote by We24fun
I am very sure our longwinded profile description puts many people off. But hey it is what it is. Not everybody is
compatible and thankfully there is a playdate for all shapes ,sizes and preferences :-)
Here is some of ours:-
People contacting us without reading our profile .
Sending us a computer generated message
People with incomplete profiles
Then there are the men with seriously angry,unfriendly face pics they send you. Smile please.
We are a straight couple. Men sending us pics wearing womens panties. Yuk !! Very off putting for us.
Any genitalia pics over the toilet
Sending us close ups of your very crazy looking eyes or pulling faces
Crude people and their crude forum names. Transvaal naaiers of pietpiel don't do it for us
And our pet hate. People offering to help us. We are not needy looking for help. Mutual fun is what we are about.
Fire away

We have a few, quite similar to what has already been stated. 

1. Not reading our profile - taking 30 seconds to read a profile should be able to tell a person if they should/ shouldn't attempt contact. With us being an interracial couple, out of respect we don't contact profiles that clearly state they are not interested in this. 

2. Sending friend requests without ever sending a message. Our profile clearly states we generally only accept these connections when we have met people. 

3. Sending messages (this is from couples) saying they want to play, but only with mrs. This is rude and gets a block from us. 99.9% of these couples wouldn't play alone, so why do they expect that we will. 

Just our 2c 

Couldnt agree more...there are a few things that we find really off putting. 

People sending random friend requests out of the blue is just strange. At least have the decency to chat a little before just firing off a friend request. 

Profiles with absolutely no info or pics. Especially when those profiles just sends you a wink or friend request. How can we like what we see if there is nothing to see but an incomplete profile. 🤔

And my (hubby's) personal number one irritation.😠 Single men sending messages indicating that they think she doesnt get enough at home and that they are the answer. But only if they can get together with her one-on-one. That gets you blocked in record time. We enjoy the lifestyle together as a couple. 

We fairly accurate in our needs yet most enquiries are so far off the mark its clear they never read our profile, one was NO BI OR GAY MEN in capital letters replying to an advert looking for well equipped bi males, our preference to play with both for Mr and Mrs is only large male equipment, but some message yes I am small sized but know how too use it, lets try just once.....

Then you get the crude and rude ones, just because we enjoy kinkier type of sex does not mean we crude, vulgar and rude, so the I will destroys your wifes ##### while CCCCC you, before even introducing yourself is another no with us.

All of the above gets a no thanks, a subsequent reply trying to debate it gets you blocked.

Grammar and spelling. Lol

Can understand the grammar and spelling being a problem to some. Luckily there is enough variety or choice on SH. Just move right on.

Some members (like ourselves ) though are afrikaans and making the effort to post their profile and replies in english. So yes our grammar will probably be not correct but I believe our spelling should be okay :-)

Bad photography would be one for us. Not everyone is a professional photographer, but a little effort goes a long way. A picture paints a thousand words and so on...

Another would be profiles that aren't 100% truthful. 90% of profiles (singles and couples) indicate the female to be bisexual or bi-curious. After talking to them you however quickly find out that it's more the husband that THINKS his lady would be into it. Very frustrating and just wasting everyone's time. 

And yes, crude, vulgar or pushy people that don't take the time to read our profile first. 

Would think about people reading our profile i mean just by reading you would know that we would be compatible or not and move on or contact that couple or single,s and yes spelling also the grammar we will try our best but as a afrikaans couple also we will do what we can 

If previously you've said No thanks" and they can't remember asking

Quote by riley
Grammar and spelling. Lol

I would like to retract my grammar/spelling comment back, if I may because I have realised that I would be guilty too if Afrikaans was the language mostly used over here!

I am a person who reads entire profiles and I think that angry or frustrated sounding profiles are not very nice to read and I usually just move away. Having said that, I do understand though, that as a couple who have pretty good photo galleries (or not even) - would get hundreds of inappropriate emails than what a single chap would get and that a couple can become desperately annoyed to the point that they are completely worn out.

There are so many couples and singles all doing and saying the wrong thing and so many comments about that.

I would like to hear from couples and singles (girls and guys) about what makes them perk up and pay attention to a profile description. Could we hear from you all, about what really appeals to you and makes you want to meet a certain couple or single after reading their description.

I'm an agist (I want someone close to my age) and that's the first thing I look at. 

From there, I like to read about the person and language and grammar catches my eye. 

If I'm still interested, I look at pictures and also if available, their friends. I don't understand why some people have a zillion friends on the list without actually meeting anyone, let alone have had a decent conversation with any of these people. 

Having a location on their profile is very important, I really don't want to spend hours getting to know someone only to find they're kilometres away and very little chance of passing my way 🤷‍♀️

No wonder I battle to find anyone 🤔

Thanks Shaybytheway. These are all very good points you have made here. I think there are those who love the web interaction mostly and then there are those who want to actually meet to interact. I find that pictures which are severely photo shopped/out of focus or so close you cannot make out the wood from the trees, ect a bit off putting. Correct grammar says a lot about a couple. 

The profile introduction is where one makes one's first impression. Make it a good one.

Regarding photos. I understand that some prefer not to make their faces visible but if they could at least just make their mouth visible. It is very easy to see if I will find a woman attractive just by looking at her mouth. I have found that rarely do profiles apply this concept and it is very helpful to me when I find one that does - especially when I get a couple contacting me saying "Hi we really enjoyed your profile, would you like to chat?" Ultimately, I need to find a woman's eyes and smile attractive before I will look at any other part of her body in order to decided if I want to make a connection. For me, eyes and smiles are the most important  when finding a woman attractive enough for me to want to play with her. I have found that I am attracted to many different types of female figures as long as I am attracted to her eyes and smile. The way she wears her hair also is very exciting to me! In a nut shell. A smile only says more to me than eyes only.

If the "looking for" section of the profile says one thing (like single guys), and as soon as you send a message you get a rude reply telling you to FOff as they they don't want single guys and "Can you not read a profile". (Ummmmm, yes I did and would not have contacted you if the profile stated otherwise.....)

Surely one can keep their public profile up to date or set up correctly at the beginning rather than send rude replies? 

People are generally rude and ill-mannered, I'm sorry to say. 

That is a total generalisation, as in between one does find a gem! 

Quote by Shaybytheway

People are generally rude and ill-mannered, I'm sorry to say. 

That is a total generalisation, as in between one does find a gem! 

Hates:

1. Generic messages. Make an effort please.

2. Couples where the lady suddenly becomes "no longer playing" or has "gone away" or has split up. Update your profile or don't bullshit in the first place.

3. Incomplete profile. How do you expect someone to make an accurate assessment if you don't tell all?

4. No pics. Even clothed ones will do. At least you can see a real live human.

5. Bad grammar. This speaks volumes.

6. Out of date photos. Keep your media fresh.

7. Don't post looking for something, normally a single man, and then get uptight when a single man makes contact.

8. Dishonesty about marital or relationship status. Hey, each to their own, but let me choose if I want to go down that road.

9. Fake photos.  No need to elaborate further.

It is difficult enough as a single guy to find quality playmates, please don't make it even harder.

For us in general it feels like the quality of profiles and correspondence has gone backwards compared to a couple of years ago.

We can't exactly figure out why that is the case but it is an observation that we have made.  

Small things usually says a lot, and when things are left out, it says just as much. Incomplete profiles just doesn't do it. Makes one wonder why things are left out.

Grammar is not the biggest of issues, but in some cases it's just horrible, not to judge though.

And the the worst......bathroom and toilet pics. Whether it is feet; legs or any thing else.

Having been in the lifestyle for many years, perhaps we have become cynical as all the reasons posted above apply to us as a point of reference when viewing profiles.   It has become so much harder to find the right person/couple that would click with us.  Maybe we getting to old and should accept it or maybe it's just a numbers game and hopefully like Lotto, we may strike it lucky, however I seriously doubt it, lol.  

Anyway, that's me rambling. The joke is we never play Lotto, go figure.....

Stay safe everyone 

Quote by HubblyBubbly

Having been in the lifestyle for many years, perhaps we have become cynical as all the reasons posted above apply to us as a point of reference when viewing profiles.   It has become so much harder to find the right person/couple that would click with us.  Maybe we getting to old and should accept it or maybe it's just a numbers game and hopefully like Lotto, we may strike it lucky, however I seriously doubt it, lol.  

Anyway, that's me rambling. The joke is we never play Lotto, go figure.....

Stay safe everyone 

  

  

I am convinced that the reason why there are so many fakes on SH is because it is a free service. I suspect that if there was at lease a nominal fee required to subscribe then the members would be narrowed down to those who are real and serious about this exciting culture. I would be happy to pay to be a member for this reason.

Biggest turn off is incomplete profiles . And this goes across the board . We ignore all profiles that is incomplete.  Just because it comes across as lazy and you are probably hiding something.  

I find it rather unusual when a profile says, 

"Please have a number pictures available if you decide to contact us" 

But then there is only one rather vague profile picture in the profile that is asking for photos to be available. 

As far as available photos are concerned, I do understand that most choose not to show their faces, however just showing ones mouth alone can make it very easy to decide if a couple/wife appeals to one. I find that the mouth/lips reveal more attractiveness than open legs do or - up close and personal - pictures of genatalia. 

Interesting how some people keep changing there profile location . Very suspicious....

• One word "upmarket"

Hate it when people ask for a specific I reply I have what they ask for ..not even a no has become a it's me..what do you guys want to see .to get a reply...your nice ..your ignored .your nasty..your ignored .what do we have to do to get a reply.

Quote by sa35couple

Interesting how some people keep changing there profile location . Very suspicious....

..I change mine when I'm out of town .I travel a lot.