Trimming a Forrest

So  Yesterday may have not been the best of days to decide it is time to clear up the nether regions of the bushy forest! It was a grey cold wet day but better then a sweaty hot day, specially for old ladies.

As I now sport a apron tummy, I just cannot crane my neck down to view the above mentioned area with the ease.I used to view it from! 
So a hand mirror was still I could not view that old pussy with ease.
I decided to be innovative and I put a big mirror on the floor standing spread eagled over it, peering down at ....Wait HORROR above HORROR!!!!!   Gray bush and sagging flesh!!!!!! Lordy-Lord!!!!!

I am a Lover of Pussies myself!!!! I do have a lady lover who is my Life Partner for the last 30 odd years after all. I also used to classify myself as Pansexual. Although now a days I am Asexual. 
But the horror I was viewing yesterday nearly made me loose my breakfast! I wonder how in the world someone could enjoy *THAT* piece of area......Ever....!

I was thinking of going to my sister for a wax as was my usual way just a year ago, BUT after looking down to the new view I was sporting, I decided to rather do something myself.

Now have you bigger ladies & gents ever tried  waxing, shaving, trimming down there yourself?? NOT the easiet thing to do !!
A gent used to tell me, *Use a easy to use creamy hair removal* while making me drool over his clean huge yummy looking cock...NO THANK you!  

Easy for men to use as their region down yonder will NOT burn Heavens to Hell. We ladies can not use any cream which is not gentle Down yonder. Any lady who is capable and does use hair removal cream down there, will be my personal hero!

Not being able to use a mirror and push up the tummy apron also presented a problem as I only have 2 hands and I needed a third hand for the shaving part! So shaving for me was NOT an option!! Even sitting on the toilet bending down and sporting anything sharp is a hazard with all those fleshy LOOSE flesh!!! And if you needed your fingers as *seeing* your way....Well Need I say more?

So, to hide the ugly new loose flesh (did I mention wrinkly) I needed to sport a nice trimmed pussy. I am turning a new leaf and decided the above is the way to go for this Old woman.
Lucky for me I have hair clippers I use for the dogs, So grabbing that and standing over the mirror on the floor and a chair on which I could lift and rest my foot and leg for a better view, I started trimming.....
Still was not as easy as It sounded and I thought......  I had to shout for some Help from my dear old willing partner in the end! Bending me over in a very undignified stance, she demanded I take, she cleaned/trimmed the erea`s I could not reach. And with out flinching....Man, she is BRAVE

Patting me on my wobbly rump afterwards,she said I looked great......What a lovey!!!!!!
At least I feel better and best of all!!! No more escaping pubes when I want to wear a panty!!

And In my opinion No lady over a certain age should go bare as a babies bottom ....hench Trimmed ....

What are your opinion??  And you guys who think you will not end up where I am right now. Just you wait.

  I will sit in my rocker and laugh at you when ever you do reach my age!!!!

Oh PiB - you had me rolling around in stitches with this description!!  When you started describing your problem, and not enough hands, I though to myself - "why doesn't she just ask Lovey to help her?"  And there - you worked that out for your self!  I'm so glad that she helped out unflinchingly!  Now I remember a time when I did the same to my lovey, and we ended up definitely NOT being asexual, as a result!!! ;-)

@ redbruce     I know and remember how these kinda situations can excite and stimulate a persons liblido. You lucky man!

Yea, but I have to confess that last happened a LONG time ago! ;-)

Smiling with pure evil intend this side of the PC.

 Men do have it easier, you could always ask your lovey to *help* you trim....and who knows what happens next!

I used to use cream and believe me it can burn us as well if left on too long. Shaving never really worked for me, it was carnage and the in-grown hairs were never fun. Besides, being a slightly hairy sort of guy my bald nether region looked like a sand trap on a putting green so now I trim. This too has it's pitfalls. An electric trimmer can cause a cut that will make your eyes water if it catches a fold of scrotum. So the best solution is to get a sub-contractor to give you a hand. 

Any volunteers?

Well I could offer  ........I used a straight razor the ONE time I did offer to shave a gent........the gent was kept tied up...blind folded....and I did have a huge *accident* .... 

(As I dripped warm syrup on his scrotum after giving him a little *pinch* with my long nails while dragging a blunt knife over the area and sorta screamed *OH MY GOD*)  Making the poor man cry in releif when I did remove his blindfold......I had to reasure him that NOTHING was really bleeding.  Due to the burning and the hot syrup, the poor man thought I neutered him....I had to REALLY calm him down.  He was cross with me for a few weeks.......but all is fair in The MIND games of kink.  And in the end I was allowed to play with him again...Kinky games that is....

Damn woman, you are evil!

@ Bob...so NOW you are running scared are you???  Laughing evily this side of the PC !!!

Oh MY Word.  Re reading some stuff I wrote over time searching for something to re write and hopefully get people to comment on all Fora gain..I had to blush and laugh reading this.  

And Yeah, I remain just trimming these days!!!!!

@pussinboots1 

Reading your threads and post really make my day... 

your humor really is infectious and makes one bubble with laughter from within.

but in your own unique way it’s still erotically pleasing to read.

loving it and I am a huge fan of your posts.

Agreed on bringing more people to the fora to interact.... 

Lovies

BH

@Oceantramps   I am sad to say I have found that when one has left the site for a while all ones post goes under Unknown. Even remains that way when you come back and use the same nick. 

Thank you for your kind words. I hope the Fora picks up a bit.

Hi all  - I have a confession in this regard.  I shaved it while ago and it was quite daunting with the protruding tummy always in the way,  but it always made me feel super-sexy afterwards- very slick to the touch.  Then a week ago I decided to go for a wax ! Man oh man - what a surprise to this liberated middle aged man! I thought  Captain Marvel would stand to attention and make me proud ! Well the lady who waxed my nether region did not seem either impressed or amused by Captain Marvel's almost total disappearance! Needless to say I helped her quite a lot in the waxing process.  I do however now feel that the ingrown hair is more problematic than with the shaving! Certainly an experience I will not forget in a hurry. 😥😁

@ swingfantasy   I had to smile, I can just imagine how *Captain Marvel* hid way way inside your body!!! I now wonder if you had just your pubic region waxed or if you had your balls and anal area waxed aswell??  I can JUST imagine your yells if the last 2 were done!!!  Thanks for sharing!!!

As for ingrown hair..... painful I know!! I have found that if you rub a decent skin cream on a freshly shaven /waxed area it helps for the in grow hair....also to use a VERY light scrubbing motion of a soft brush or a softened luffa on your skin after  the 2nd day after waxing....it helps prevent in grow hair.

Quote by swingfantasy
Hi all  - I have a confession in this regard.  I shaved it while ago and it was quite daunting with the protruding tummy always in the way,  but it always made me feel super-sexy afterwards- very slick to the touch.  Then a week ago I decided to go for a wax ! Man oh man - what a surprise to this liberated middle aged man! I thought  Captain Marvel would stand to attention and make me proud ! Well the lady who waxed my nether region did not seem either impressed or amused by Captain Marvel's almost total disappearance! Needless to say I helped her quite a lot in the waxing process.  I do however now feel that the ingrown hair is more problematic than with the shaving! Certainly an experience I will not forget in a hurry. 😥😁

Hey SwingFantasy,

I mus say I also recently discover the joys of waxing. Took me a while to find a proper salon to do it. Eventually found a salon in Hyde Park. Been a few times now and not once have I had any ingrown hairs or issues. They use a proper wax that is hypo allergenic and them some balm afterwards. They explain the aftercare part very well. 

Let me know if you want the details

Hi @Pussinboots1 and stred.  Thanks for your responses.  I only had twig and berries done and area above twig. It was this area above the twig which was particularly troublesome. I received an aftercare pack from the therapist,  which I used but it seems as a waxing-virgin, this was bound to happen.  I am supposed to go for my second de-fluff session soon. Oh by the way the smooth feeling of my berries is amazing! Cheers. 

HI @swingfantasy, 

I was drinking my coffee whilst reading your post and when I came to the part of "twig and berries", I chocked on my coffee and almost wet myself laughing.  I guess there is always a first time to read up a new description, never heard that one before.  Thank you for the good laugh, despite the coffee going up my nose. 

@Pussinboots, got to say, love reading your posts.  Thank you. 

Hi Hubblybubbly  - glad that you enjoyed that description.  It is DEFINITELY important to not take ourselves too seriously.  I think about the absurdity of the whole situation sometimes and wonder what the hell the waxing therapist must be thinking.  Do they judge us for wanting the smoothest "twig &berries" or va-jay-jay? Do they dispise our vanity? OR are they sometimes turned on ??? Just wondering.  Suppose it is the same with a massage therapist!