Maybe this topic is a little but I would like to know from you guys if you think swinging is exclusive to being religious or spiritual? Most religions have some rules against adultery......Is it all in the definition? Is it hypercritical to go to a lifestyle party on Saturday nite and sit in church on Sunday ?
We have met some deeply spiritual people here
or is it non of other peoples business?
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swinging and religion
Who can get up for *church* after a Saturday party is my question...
Okay I am just teasing.....I never get involved with religion talk.
But I do have an interesting story about a Psychology Pastor I worked with...
Shortly,
He is married , knows I am in gay relationship(long before it was legal) he always wanted to know how we made love.
My friend who at tht time was working with us, told him about a little vibrator she loves.
With out me knowing she took it to show him and left it under her car seat
Few days later she hears this buzzing noise,
she opens the engine NOTHING
she checks the car and tires NOTHING but the buzzing keeps on going..
So she stops at male neighbor and ask if he know anything about cars before she goes to the garage with this noise..
He opens everything listens and then LOOKS under the seat pulling out the BUZZING VIBRATOR EGG.
SHE WAS VERY EMBARRASSED!! me I laughed like a lunatic.... just glad it was not the garage people finding the *problem*
anyway the P Pastor got to hear the story laughed with us and later told us he and his wife went to Adult World to buy TOYS...
Oh I like this one!
I believe that everyone is different, in that, instead of looking for the wrong things in life, one should rather focus on replacing the behaviours that we know deep down are NOT good for our individual soul.
Now everyone's got a different list of things that come to mind when I say that, and that is the list of stuff you should be striving to master. This is a very focussed and achievable goal in terms of eventually being in a place where you can say you are at peace with yourself and your maker and your world.
This strategy is also in line with orvmanagable within most religious beliefs and also bears excellent results from a coaching perspective.
It is also an awesome way to destress your personal spiritual journey, releasing you from rules and regulations (or transcending them, as many religions strive for) and allowing you to have a more meaningful experience of concepts like meditation and grace.
Then the question becomes, "is swinging right for you", rather than "is swinging right"?
I welcome discussion on my viewpoint!
Quote by Pussinboots1
Who can get up for *church* after a Saturday party is my question...
Okay I am just teasing.....I never get involved with religion talk.
But I do have an interesting story about a Psychology Pastor I worked with...
Shortly,
He is married , knows I am in gay relationship(long before it was legal) he always wanted to know how we made love.
My friend who at tht time was working with us, told him about a little vibrator she loves.
With out me knowing she took it to show him and left it under her car seat
Few days later she hears this buzzing noise,
she opens the engine NOTHING
she checks the car and tires NOTHING but the buzzing keeps on going..
So she stops at male neighbor and ask if he know anything about cars before she goes to the garage with this noise..
He opens everything listens and then LOOKS under the seat pulling out the BUZZING VIBRATOR EGG.
SHE WAS VERY EMBARRASSED!! me I laughed like a lunatic.... just glad it was not the garage people finding the *problem*
anyway the P Pastor got to hear the story laughed with us and later told us he and his wife went to Adult World to buy TOYS...
Thx PIB! This was spiritually deep! Especially the last sentence showing our human-"ess" !!!
Quote by LeeEC
Oh I like this one!
........
Then the question becomes, "is swinging right for you", rather than "is swinging right"?
That's precisely the Q & (my own A) that's keeping my interest!
We (always) want to know what is right (or wrong..) / think that we're doing the right thing ..... BUT the test lies in the heart (meaning - attitude) from a wise man called Solomon
It is my view that we, as spiritual beings, are all here as one of multiple incarnations, to interact with our fellow inhabitants at every level, family, business, social, recreational whatever, and to enjoy certain expriences which WE have chosen to pursue in this lifetime.
They may include being a motor racing driver, pilot, skydiver, mountaineer, medical worker in outer mongolia, or even a swinger or dogger, yes. An example would be for a religious parent to prevent their kid from learning the guitar because guitar players play in bands and bands play in hotels and people drink liquor in hotels and ppl who drink liquor in hotels become alcaholics and....... and ......... And all the kid wanted to do is learn to play the guitar.
When these chosen paths & experiences clash with the man-made rules and regulations (thou shalt nots....) of the many religions on this planet, it causes tremendous conflict in our beings and unless cleared, will persist through life, and through transition only to be clinging on into our next incarnation.
It is only when one of the opposing forces gives way to the other that we can move on with the life we intended for ourselves on this earth. Each individual has to chose which force will give way to the other.
After a very religious (well meaning) upbringing I managed to extricate myself from the indoctrination and conciously and steadfastly rejected all forms of earthly religion, for the fakes they are, more than 30 years ago, AND PROMPTLY STARTED LIVING!
The benefit to me has exceeded those of a thousand hollow so-called promised blessings sprouted from pulpits every Sunday. I have not regretted my decision for a second.
So, regarding the topic; yes swinging, dogging, playing guitar or bagpipes and all those enjoyable passtimes and pleasures can definitely not be reconciled with religion with all their "thou shalt nots..". Dont even try. Chose.
:angel:
:jagsatwork:
They may include being a motor racing driver, pilot, skydiver, mountaineer, medical worker in outer mongolia, or even a swinger or dogger, yes. An example would be for a religious parent to prevent their kid from learning the guitar because guitar players play in bands and bands play in hotels and people drink liquor in hotels and ppl who drink liquor in hotels become alcaholics and....... and ......... And all the kid wanted to do is learn to play the guitar.
When these chosen paths & experiences clash with the man-made rules and regulations (thou shalt nots....) of the many religions on this planet, it causes tremendous conflict in our beings and unless cleared, will persist through life, and through transition only to be clinging on into our next incarnation.
It is only when one of the opposing forces gives way to the other that we can move on with the life we intended for ourselves on this earth. Each individual has to chose which force will give way to the other.
After a very religious (well meaning) upbringing I managed to extricate myself from the indoctrination and conciously and steadfastly rejected all forms of earthly religion, for the fakes they are, more than 30 years ago, AND PROMPTLY STARTED LIVING!
The benefit to me has exceeded those of a thousand hollow so-called promised blessings sprouted from pulpits every Sunday. I have not regretted my decision for a second.
So, regarding the topic; yes swinging, dogging, playing guitar or bagpipes and all those enjoyable passtimes and pleasures can definitely not be reconciled with religion with all their "thou shalt nots..". Dont even try. Chose.
:angel:
:jagsatwork: To all you guys I have read and loved your answers. Who would have thought that people involved in ..what society percieves to be a shallow pastime could have such deep and meaningfull opinions ...not to mention elegantly put
Actually makes me wonder about all the commonly held norms in our society and how people hang on to them like a baby hangs onto it's blanky lol
Really looking forward to reading about other subjects pertaining to life in general
xxx
Revel
Mostly, in my experience, people hang on to stuff because of fear:
Fear of the unknown
Fear of being judged
Fear of people's impressions, and thoughts
Fear of social/community/group dynamics repercussions
Fear of the personal consequences
People fear because they are not confident about what they believe, who they are and what they stand for and because they don't have any idea how to redefine themselves or their stand point and do so with decisiveness. Mainly because they lack the tools to do this and the strength of their convictions on which to base their new stand point.
In practice, once you have a definitive new conviction on which to build a new standpoint, and then the resulting confidence in that stand point, in order to build a new "self" on; things pretty much bloom from there...
Familiar is comfortable, even if it doesn't fit very well anymore - look at your wardrobe - you'll see I'm right 
Quote by Thumper
"If thy Morals make thee dreary, depend upon it, they are wrong.
I do not say give them up, for they may be all thou hast,
but conceal them like a vice, lest they should spoil the lives of better and simpler people."
-Robert Louis Stevenson
I Googled RLS and found the first part of his quote (but couldn't find the second) - it makes sense but maybe need deeper thought which I'm not going to do.
Golden Rule of Morals which states that "One should treat others as one would like others to treat oneself" is a test that I live by and is easy to apply!
Quote by LeeEC
Mostly, in my experience, people hang on to stuff because of fear:
Fear of the unknown
Fear of being judged
Fear of people's impressions, and thoughts
Fear of social/community/group dynamics repercussions
Fear of the personal consequences
People fear because they are not confident about what they believe, who they are and what they stand for and because they don't have any idea how to redefine themselves or their stand point and do so with decisiveness. Mainly because they lack the tools to do this and the strength of their convictions on which to base their new stand point.
In practice, once you have a definitive new conviction on which to build a new standpoint, and then the resulting confidence in that stand point, in order to build a new "self" on; things pretty much bloom from there...
Familiar is comfortable, even if it doesn't fit very well anymore - look at your wardrobe - you'll see I'm right
Exactly! I can see where it comes from because if we look at Religion (-Noun): "A means to control the masses through fear of eternal pain" I get the feeling that where you get religion there is also unhappiness - a dichotomy??
But that's how we grew up ... you accept everything (are gullible) until you reach a point where you have (sometimes are forced?) to think outside the box!
Another conflict that we just live with - look what is happening in the real world and how we have to respond (adapt / survive / wheel & deal) to get 'acceptable results' and that differs from the theory / teachings of many 'things' (morality, attitudes, conviction ) for e.g. success, etc.
Swinging (in the real sense) is more inclusive with Spirituality, and I will dare to explain why I say this.
Not because I'm the perfect swinger, but the more I learn from the 'foundations' of the lifestyle and all my fora contributor friends (although there's enough evidence that it's not always perfect - what is?) the more I realise how much hang-ups we have in a 'normal' marriage that's supposed to be happy and perfect - that can actually be solved QUICKLY with the correct training/help from other experienced partners (than maybe the hard core professional help? 
)
Ummmmmmmm .... OK?
)
Ummmmmmmm .... OK? Quote by Thumper
"If thy Morals make thee dreary, depend upon it, they are wrong.
I do not say give them up, for they may be all thou hast,
but conceal them like a vice, lest they should spoil the lives of better and simpler people."
-Robert Louis Stevenson
This full quote as above appears on page 120 of RLS Book "Across the Plains"
Quote by Thumper
"If thy Morals make thee dreary, depend upon it, they are wrong.
I do not say give them up, for they may be all thou hast,
but conceal them like a vice, lest they should spoil the lives of better and simpler people."
-Robert Louis Stevenson
This full quote as above appears on page 120 of RLS Book "Across the Plains"
Thanks Thumper!
I wonder how much guilt and feelings of self loathing could have been avoided if people could realise that they can make there own rules once they become adults. It's ok to evaluate life and decide for yourself what is right and what is wrong.
This does not make you immoral. The definition of which could be living without principles. But rather very moral because you have actually thought about your principles and stick to them. When you make your own rules the consequences are greater when you break them
Quote by Thehollies
I wonder how much guilt and feelings of self loathing could have been avoided if people could realise that they can make there own rules once they become adults. It's ok to evaluate life and decide for yourself what is right and what is wrong.
This does not make you immoral. The definition of which could be living without principles. But rather very moral because you have actually thought about your principles and stick to them. When you make your own rules the consequences are greater when you break them
Exactly!
Why so? Is it because it's a complex process (growing up and all?) or too easy for words!
I prefer the lack of sexual morals, my wife has none, she has her own set of morals but it took a lot of convincing from me to let her see I did not mind her screwing around and that it was her right
Now this is allowable in some religions
I also know a pastor that is very sexual and in a nice way and not like a lot that screw the confused wive's in the back while counceling them
Not that he is my "Guru" (I don't bow and scrape to any mortal man), but I do enjoy reading and watching the many videos on "You Tube" of the late Christopher Hitchens, if only because he articulates his views on the subject in a way I am unable to do.
Anyone interested in pursuing the subject of 'freeing oneself from the effects of a religious upbringing', can do worse than watch a few of his videos. Google them for free. !
