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someone explain to me please

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So after a lot of nervousness I finally attended a club in the Kya Sands area -I cant remember the name of it but would be glad for more info . If was cool but to be honest,there wasn't much going on I think that because it was my first time. i was quite nervous and excited I sat at the bar for a while and checked this out - btwI was the only person of colour in the place !! The other rooms just had people sitting around chatting and smoking or drinking or in the pool I went to the locker room and the was a couple there getting Undressed they were both very friendly and in their 50s she was quite hot they made idle chatter for a few minutes and then walked off toa private room she turned and smiled at me as they left . I didn't think initially that it was anything but it later occurred to me that it was less than innocent so I went to see if I could find them . They were in a room . Yyou could hear that they were quite energetically going at it but the door was shut . As a newcomer I guess thst the right thing to do was to not bother them. The door was closed after all . And there wasnt an explicit invitation. BUT, I am not the quickest on the uptake and in retrospect am 120% sure that there was more to the chat and the departing smile What would you have done?
Quote by MaverRick
So after a lot of nervousness I finally attended a club in the Kya Sands area -I cant remember the name of it but would be glad for more info . If was cool but to be honest,there wasn't much going on I think that because it was my first time. i was quite nervous and excited I sat at the bar for a while and checked this out - btwI was the only person of colour in the place !! The other rooms just had people sitting around chatting and smoking or drinking or in the pool
I went to the locker room and the was a couple there getting Undressed they were both very friendly and in their 50s she was quite hot they made idle chatter for a few minutes and then walked off toa private room she turned and smiled at me as they left .
I didn't think initially that it was anything but it later occurred to me that it was less than innocent so I went to see if I could find them . They were in a room . Yyou could hear that they were quite energetically going at it but the door was shut .
As a newcomer I guess thst the right thing to do was to not bother them. The door was closed after all . And there wasnt an explicit invitation. BUT, I am not the quickest on the uptake and in retrospect am 120% sure that there was more to the chat and the departing smile
What would you have done?

Firstly, I would not have noticed the fact that I was the only person of colour I could in the club.
As for the rest of it, probably exactly the same as what you did.
You were more than brave to go to a club, most men are to scared to go alone. As for the the ethnic thing, depends on the club and evening you are going, the ratio might differ on different nights. @ SDMR I would think checking out the scene is a very natural thing to do,I would check out the amount of single men, single women,couples, what is happening,where and with whom, and yeah it is also natural to check for your own ethnic groups, I think it is very natural to do this DON~T we all do this kind of thing when we enter a new place?? Back to MaverRick You will never know what that smiled meant if you did not tell them you are a newbie and need *help and directions* in the swinger scene. Only thing I would have done differently is I would have tried to get the floor hostess, introduced myself and asked her to introduce me to a few regulars as I am a newbie. She or he would then have introduced me to the club and the few regulars. I might have also went to the jacuzzi and entered there(asked if you might join off course)as it is for everyone, and there people tend to speak to each other. Reading your account shows me you have behaved well and kept to the rules...closed doors mean NO voyeurism and NO entrance and no participation.
Thanks guys Appreciate the feedback . I only noticed the colour thing cos I think Indian women are hot!,! It wont happen again as its a moot point -my apologies Icwould love to go back there but I have to be better prepared I may have to start smaller though and try to meet couples in a more intimate setting like home or hotel
Thanks guys Appreciate the feedback . I only noticed the colour thing cos I think Indian women are hot!,!- sorry about that wont happen again Icwould love to go back there but I have to be better prepared I may have to start smaller though and try to meet couples in a more intimate setting like home or hotel
Quote by Pussinboots1
You were more than brave to go to a club, most men are to scared to go alone.
As for the the ethnic thing, depends on the club and evening you are going, the ratio might differ on different nights.
@ SDMR I would think checking out the scene is a very natural thing to do,I would check out the amount of single men, single women,couples, what is happening,where and with whom, and yeah it is also natural to check for your own ethnic groups, I think it is very natural to do this DON~T we all do this kind of thing when we enter a new place??

Ummmm? maybe I am the only one who doesn't add the checking ethnic groups? dunno
@ SDMR I do not have a list I check out per se...it is just a natural sort of thing to do....and yeah I notice a LOT more things that I did not even mention... Like how many drunks are there If there is people using drugs is there dancing who is doing who What is being done who is on the pole and are they good at it. what other woman are wearing am I the only fatty there or the oldest one there I check out jewelery I check out shoes heck I check out a LOT of things.. and ethnic is just a fleeting thing aswell Not just a list I have that I check out That is why I say it is normal to check out and notice things....
Guys , also remember that this was my first time. I was nervous, hesitant, excited, and a few other emotions at the same time. I spent a lot of time checking other people out for a few reasons. I wanted to see if there was anyone there that msy know me, I wanted to see if I was the ugliest/fattest/most out of shape/smallest dick etc etc in the place . I spoke to exactly 4 people the couple above, the doorperson and the bartender and thst was only to order a drink! I spent the rest of the time "people-watching" - pretty much what PiB does but with the eyes of a newbie!
Quote by MaverRick
Guys , also remember that this was my first time. I was nervous, hesitant, excited, and a few other emotions at the same time. I spent a lot of time checking other people out for a few reasons. I wanted to see if there was anyone there that msy know me, I wanted to see if I was the ugliest/fattest/most out of shape/smallest dick etc etc in the place . I spoke to exactly 4 people the couple above, the doorperson and the bartender and thst was only to order a drink!
I spent the rest of the time "people-watching" - pretty much what PiB does but with the eyes of a newbie!

Welcome and congrats on taking the dive, :P wishing you lots of juicy pleasure smile
Personally I think most people would notice if they are the only one in an environment, I know I would and from past experience at functions in Tokoza etc. I did feel like a sore thumb until someone broke the ice for me. Just like I noticed that I was the only one in the whole street dressed up like a chicken as a teenager doing promotional work.
Quote by playcouple
Guys , also remember that this was my first time. I was nervous, hesitant, excited, and a few other emotions at the same time. I spent a lot of time checking other people out for a few reasons. I wanted to see if there was anyone there that msy know me, I wanted to see if I was the ugliest/fattest/most out of shape/smallest dick etc etc in the place . I spoke to exactly 4 people the couple above, the doorperson and the bartender and thst was only to order a drink!
I spent the rest of the time "people-watching" - pretty much what PiB does but with the eyes of a newbie!

Welcome and congrats on taking the dive, :P wishing you lots of juicy pleasure smile
Personally I think most people would notice if they are the only one in an environment, I know I would and from past experience at functions in Tokoza etc. I did feel like a sore thumb until someone broke the ice for me. Just like I noticed that I was the only one in the whole street dressed up like a chicken as a teenager doing promotional work.
Ok, but was one of your first actions after this / these experiences, to go on line and tell other people?
I went to the club 3 years ago... I only now mentioned it as a gave up trying after that and this is my first time back in a forum like this with people of similar ilk
Well I know when I have done something I liked or done new, Like visiting Beefcakes here in Cpt I write about it!!! I like to share and I like to know what others think. I once again think it is a quite *normal* thing to do...to share and ask questions. Also I am glad that M did this he is giving us all something to chat about!!!
You have no idea how hard I am trying to keep discussions going so that theres something to chst about!!!
Well MaverRick Start a new topic maybe????
Quote by Pussinboots1
Well I know when I have done something I liked or done new, Like visiting Beefcakes here in Cpt I write about it!!! I like to share and I like to know what others think.
I once again think it is a quite *normal* thing to do...to share and ask questions.
Also I am glad that M did this he is giving us all something to chat about!!!

Look, all I am getting at is, if I was going to write about my visit to a sex club, I do not think I would leave out details like, dick size, shapes, gender ratio, people I knew etc etc in order to mention something about how many people of the same race as me where there.
Whatever anybody else chooses to add to their write up is their choice, but as we have all said countless times, if you are going to put something on-line, there is bound to be someone who may not quite agree with you. Take my comments on the matter as an example, nobody else who contributed seems to agree with me, and that's fine, we all have our own varying views.
Yup You are right SDMR is it not lucky that we can choose what we want to share or not to.
Quote by SDMR
Guys , also remember that this was my first time. I was nervous, hesitant, excited, and a few other emotions at the same time. I spent a lot of time checking other people out for a few reasons. I wanted to see if there was anyone there that msy know me, I wanted to see if I was the ugliest/fattest/most out of shape/smallest dick etc etc in the place . I spoke to exactly 4 people the couple above, the doorperson and the bartender and thst was only to order a drink!
I spent the rest of the time "people-watching" - pretty much what PiB does but with the eyes of a newbie!

Welcome and congrats on taking the dive, :P wishing you lots of juicy pleasure smile
Personally I think most people would notice if they are the only one in an environment, I know I would and from past experience at functions in Tokoza etc. I did feel like a sore thumb until someone broke the ice for me. Just like I noticed that I was the only one in the whole street dressed up like a chicken as a teenager doing promotional work.
Ok, but was one of your first actions after this / these experiences, to go on line and tell other people?
Online didn't exist and and there are no common interest forums that I know of for the Thokoza etc functions, if there are I am not a member of any, so answer is no, however if I were I probably would.
I did post a pic on facebook though of the one, does that count?
Quote by playcouple
Guys , also remember that this was my first time. I was nervous, hesitant, excited, and a few other emotions at the same time. I spent a lot of time checking other people out for a few reasons. I wanted to see if there was anyone there that msy know me, I wanted to see if I was the ugliest/fattest/most out of shape/smallest dick etc etc in the place . I spoke to exactly 4 people the couple above, the doorperson and the bartender and thst was only to order a drink!
I spent the rest of the time "people-watching" - pretty much what PiB does but with the eyes of a newbie!

Welcome and congrats on taking the dive, :P wishing you lots of juicy pleasure smile
Personally I think most people would notice if they are the only one in an environment, I know I would and from past experience at functions in Tokoza etc. I did feel like a sore thumb until someone broke the ice for me. Just like I noticed that I was the only one in the whole street dressed up like a chicken as a teenager doing promotional work.
Ok, but was one of your first actions after this / these experiences, to go on line and tell other people?
Online didn't exist and and there are no common interest forums that I know of for the Thokoza etc functions, if there are I am not a member of any, so answer is no, however if I were I probably would.
I did post a pic on facebook though of the one, does that count?
I suppose it does. Did you also add a caption regarding the race ratio's? Not 100% sure the people of Thokoza would be all that impressed if you did, but who knows.
Quote by SDMR
Guys , also remember that this was my first time. I was nervous, hesitant, excited, and a few other emotions at the same time. I spent a lot of time checking other people out for a few reasons. I wanted to see if there was anyone there that msy know me, I wanted to see if I was the ugliest/fattest/most out of shape/smallest dick etc etc in the place . I spoke to exactly 4 people the couple above, the doorperson and the bartender and thst was only to order a drink!
I spent the rest of the time "people-watching" - pretty much what PiB does but with the eyes of a newbie!

Welcome and congrats on taking the dive, :P wishing you lots of juicy pleasure smile
Personally I think most people would notice if they are the only one in an environment, I know I would and from past experience at functions in Tokoza etc. I did feel like a sore thumb until someone broke the ice for me. Just like I noticed that I was the only one in the whole street dressed up like a chicken as a teenager doing promotional work.
Ok, but was one of your first actions after this / these experiences, to go on line and tell other people?
Online didn't exist and and there are no common interest forums that I know of for the Thokoza etc functions, if there are I am not a member of any, so answer is no, however if I were I probably would.
I did post a pic on facebook though of the one, does that count?
I suppose it does. Did you also add a caption regarding the race ratio's? Not 100% sure the people of Thokoza would be all that impressed if you did, but who knows.
I think the pic made the race ratio quite clear, as they say a picture paints 1000 words.
As for them not being impressed, usually at these things they do make a thing of it, in the positive sense as in 'wow, welcome, you took the trouble, thank you....' etc. no comments of 'what the hell are you doing here variety.....'
P.S. I'm not in the habit of putting captions to photos
Hey guys. I'd like to point out that had no one commented on the fact that he noticed his own difference to the majority of other people (and not being in his position you could not relate even if you wanted to) this whole thread would probably be about how the other couple was at a club but shagging each other with a closed door... that's an expensive shag you could have had at home. ... @SDMR -My friend, I know your intention was to point out that everything doesn't have to be about race but the actual result was to make this entire thread entirely about race. So can we drop this now please?
Thank you lee. I was beginning to wonder when someone would realise that the point was completely lost
Quote by MaverRick
Thank you lee. I was beginning to wonder when someone would realise that the point was completely lost

Just a pity it could not have been you.
If you looked at previous forums that exactly what i asked, bit then told that people have rights and that's only a debate. Thanks for the people, afterwards send me mails and agree with my point.
Quote by Adonis
If you looked at previous forums that exactly what i asked, bit then told that people have rights and that's only a debate.
Thanks for the people, afterwards send me mails and agree with my point.

It seems as if people only have rights on this topic if they have a certain skin tone. I hope that I get to see a man being a man and no longer a man being a black man or white man in my lifetime, but I somehow doubt even my children's children will get to see that.
Our life span to short, because we been reminded of it every day.