Sex Addiction

We live in a society where it's mostly men who ask for sex from women. That's perfectly fine. Women are strangely not seen as sex-seeking beings. Mostly people think it weird when we do find the odd female who wants and demands sex.  Does this make the female a nymphomaniac or males a satyriasis or a person who is sexually addicted to sex or some might even say those males/females are just plainly perverted. Who decides how much sex is too much? And how do we determine when a person is out of control?  Sexual addiction,  participation or engagement in sexual activity,  is a topic that many don’t want to linger goodness Being a sexual person these days you never get diagnosed as being mentally ill anymore. And you most certainly are not  forced to undergo torture like having your clitoris removed or having to wear a chastity belt and many others being a female. Men however never seemed to have had the same problem.

I do know a few married ladies think and frequently tell their hubbies they are sexually addicted, sheesh some even file for divorce for the same reason. A woman will only be described as wanting sex too much if her partner cannot satisfy her.

My thoughts on the whole subject is whether it is nymphomania, satyriasis, hypersexuality, sexual compulsion or addiction, it is totally in the eye of the beholder.

Me,  I was never a nympho nor addicted.  I would say most people would think me perverted, I myself would  not ever think so myself. I am just a normal female who likes/ed what she likes/ed....

I want to know if there is anyone out here who think their partner is addicted to sex, or would you describe yourself as being addicted to sex or just plainly a satyriasis or nymphomaniac?

Rou raise some very interesting points

I would say most men are satyriasis(and most here would have to look up the term) or think they are..There are limits for us men hahahah... And i have been quiet surprised how woman in my circle have rediscovered there sexuality now that they are in there 50's...But it would be interesting to find how many people are truly addicted....and what the experts say is to much...

Society seems to think that it okay for a man to have lots of lovers..But the same rule does not seem to apply to woman...The term slut comes to mind..Which is so unfair....

So like you im interested in what people define as addicted to sex....And to take it a step further...Is it with many partners

I agree with haveusbc. For me, it is not really uncontrollable (I do not jump every lady I meet) but I definitely would like to have more. I would not describe anyone as being addicted to sex, it's nature and I also believe we should not all have just one partner, it's NOT natural   

@haveusbc  Being mature and more independent and less worried what society prescribes and demands as being sexy,makes most ladies more open minded towards any sexual encounter and they begin to explore unexplored areas as they become more comfortable in their own bodies after a certain age.

@Henny55    I hear you.  

I sometimes wonder how many ladies, if honest about their feelings, would be open to the lifestyle because I think they are afraid of what others might say and afraid of jealousy (I don't understand jealousy, it makes no sense to me) 

Well i think there is people out there who is addicted to sex and that makes them weird say weird things having weird fanatasys and and but we dont judge aslong as we can live out our fantasys and thats also why many women dont feel like to free up in the lifestyle they are scared of what people will say because its a lady i know my wife is super secure in herself we keep it diskreet and socialise from time to time with lifestylers in a secure place she likes dress up and get nude as soon as she feel secure i dont hold her back and its just awesome to see a other side of her just in a way how she can freely express her sexuality and have fun men can have fun but women can just as much without to be judge. And the lifestyle give the women so much freedom just depends how the hubbys or boyfriends engourge there wifes and compliment them at end of the day it all start how we as the men treat our women and dont judge them .

greetings

When I met my wife I was one of 5 guys dating and fucking my wife, only found out later

I did not want to scare her off so I took it easy and when I moved in with her, wow, she woke me up with a screw, every morning

As I am turned on by a woman that likes a lots of different cocks she was my fantasy aand now after 31 years she is still very active but I have slowed down some

Any advice for teststerone

Quote by Voyer1105
When I met my wife I was one of 5 guys dating and fucking my wife, only found out later
I did not want to scare her off so I took it easy and when I moved in with her, wow, she woke me up with a screw, every morning
As I am turned on by a woman that likes a lots of different cocks she was my fantasy aand now after 31 years she is still very active but I have slowed down some
Any advice for teststerone

 she should be here as well..not only you hahahahaha

Quote by pussinboots1  @haveusbc  Being mature and more independent and less worried what society prescribes and demands as being sexy,makes most ladies more open minded towards any sexual encounter and they begin to explore unexplored areas as they become more comfortable in their own bodies after a certain age. yes i agree...so called more mature woman do become more open minded...is it also possible that they feel time is running out for them...they feel that there looks are fading and that men wont find them attractive...when they realize that mens attractions also change and that we start finding more sagging  breasts very attractive..they become more open and curious but i think we are digressing here.... when is sex an addiction...once a day? twice a day.?..having multiple partners becouse your partner does not have the same drive?....  so maybe i should ask who has sex every day?....and be careful with your answers..your nose might get longer hahahahahahahah

@ Henny55   I found a LOT,heck way to MANY wives being coerced into the lifestyle. It is a thin line walking when you introduce or talk/ask your spouse if they also have the swapping fantasy. I also found that once you meet a couple,you soon pick up that the wife is NOT keen to be where they are. Jealousy is also a way bigger problem than what most people realize. Being it from the either the female or the male. BUT that is between couples and there is a lot of literature for potential swingers to absorb and take note off. 

@coupleno9  Thanks for partaking in this Fora and Welcome. Please feel free to always add something to all posted Fora`s, the more diverse opinions we read about a subject, the more we all learn something.

You give great information on how to treat your spouse to ensure, both partners in a couple, stay happy and vibrant. I just want to add that the ladies should also do the very same for their hubbies, that is something we should not forget.

As for people you think is addicted to sex...you seem to say they act weird, care to elaborate  as you seem to have met a few of the people who seemed addicted. It would give a nice perspective to read about that part.

@Voyer1105  Your spouse sounds like a wonderfully open minded lady!  

Thinking about my own asexual status at this time...I feel you have only slowed down, not stopped at all, so on advice for testosterone....maybe your doctor will prescribe the little blue pill??? IF ONLY needed of course...

@haveusbc   Sure, lucky we all know it is NOT just the females that ages and have bodily changes.... men grow hair in their ears & nose that grows grotesque,  have sagging balls & shrinking cocks, do not get erections that lasts, most have a *bier pens* and larger boobs, and they also get a lot of wrinkles...but where we ladies are sort of okay with our changes there is some men who start panicking and flit from one YOUNG lady to the next younger one....and those little ladies,  well do not let my say anything about their motivation....

As for what is to much sex and what is to many partners...

I know having a person masturbates to the extent that they can not keep their hands outa their pants and from their crotch Is a first indication.   Having said this,  just a reminder, I am NOT talking about a YOUNG adolescent  boy who has discovered the pleasure of having a penis....

Someone who has starting to neglect his/her daily routine & work for the sake of searching for new partners, just to drop them at the blink of an eye for the next conquest. Thus flitting from one person to the next, in one day. Losing control of their jobs/getting fired/or resign...many other indications of personal deterioration.

A person who had *normal* sex starts to ask for extreme acts of lewd sex. Now that depends on a person's view of what is lewd or not...many would say anal is lewd, some would say double penetration is lewd, some might say playing with toys is lewd... only with a background investigation one would be able to determine what was *normal* before the NOW.

A person who browses a lot of pornsites (here again we might differ as a sexual addicted person is actively active and social, while a porn addict is mostly alone and secluded and never meet partners in real life.

A person who becomes distressed, anxious, restless, and possibly violent if unable to engage in a sexual activity.

A person becomes less inclined to adhere to sexual safety, forgoing condoms and cleanliness. Many would start paying for sexual partners, when they cannot find willing partners quick enough.

This is just a few indications I know about, there may be MANY MANY more indications and only with a thorough back ground history taken from a person who suspects he/she is addicted one can make a positive diagnoses, and even then, one could not really make a medical diagnosis like alcoholism and drug abuse.

There however is like with any addiction, ways to get help.

@pussinboots1 Thanks for the respond and opinions its so true also that the wifes also must treat the hubbies the same other wise we wouldnt be in the lifestyle swinging is a couples thing to enjoy and its deemed to break you if the one isnt in to it .On the subject of weird sex addicts and i must say its mostly men met them at private partys clubs for me well its just my opinion they act rude no respect to women its in my eyes a weirdness that can be related to sex addicted maybe its just why some of them are single and dont know how to treat a lady and this is not for all the single guys i know there is allot of nice guys it can be a guy part of a couple too . For other people i dont know what is weird we spoke and didnt even met a guy or maybe couple and i can sence a weirdness very fast but what is weird for many people i dont know can anyboday maybe relate. Or maybe you know we all in the lifestyle have a weirdness about ourself lol just a opinion from me .

@coupleno9   Men at swingers parties are usually limited to only a very few single males, so most men there, is usually married. Usually the single ladies are encouraged to attend such parties by giving them discount on entrance fees and maybe some free booze for the first *happy* hour.  Maybe things have changed since I left the active scene. But that was what was usual in my time.(although I found the large difference in the amount of entrance fee for men too females to be really astronomical, and slightly unfair. I say this because sometimes a male has to save up the fee for  entrance while sometimes the female could easily pay the same amount with ease without saving up for a month or more...This is unfair in my eyes, because we as females always moan about equality...just seemed unfair.) Although I did understand the motivation behind the vast difference in the amount as entrance fees.

I have found that  some of the women as well as some of the men gets overstimulated and all rules applied to the swing scene flies right out of their heads. Specially when booze is used to *relax* them, (that is why I did not like anyone who drank to much to even approach me)  Somehow their inhibitions are totally lost when preceiving a female/male showing all her/his assets. Then they get rude and demanding when said No to.

I believe  the weirdness you might be talking about is these individuals who`s perception of the sexual interludes/ nude people they are watching, and then approach in these rude demanding manner as being a tease or just plain difficult and they feel the lady /male is sexualy Promiscuous, instead of  just that they are more open to sexual interludes. Thus the *weird* people should just really understand the word NO and NOT interested. Which they do not. Thus they might not really be weird or addicted to sex, just assholes!

Just my own 2 cents worth.

I have attended a few parties at Rome but when I do I never drink alcohol, only soda water. I do not approach any ladies by myself because I do not want them to think I am pushy. I hope to never be that weird person who upsets other people  

@ Henny55   I was not attacking anyone/person with my comment to coupleno9, I was just giving my own observations over the years. and saying the people are not weird/or sex addicted at all, just over jealous with their pursuits.

i think at some stage pussinboots1 everybody gets a bit over jealous with there pursuits especially when there is alcohol involved...

to your earlier point ..i think when you are not getting much sex..you think about it constantly and your judgement gets a bit clouded and you want it with any body that happens to be available...i think that when it gets to be a problem...not how often you doing it( we do it about 5 times a week..thought i would just mention it so you know from which position my opinions are coming from)

@haveusbc  I think you should thank your lucky stars you get laid at least 5 times a week. I know couples who is lucky to have sex once a month (if he is lucky) and I know there is more people like my one friend out there who is in the very same boat. I also know that MOSTLY being married means less sex for MOST couples.  As for me  Well I am asexual these days..so NO sex for me per se....for MONTHS ...Well that is the new normal for us....

@haveusbc  I think you should thank your lucky stars you get laid at least 5 times a week. I know couples who is lucky to have sex once a month (if he is lucky) and I know there is more people like my one friend out there who is in the very same boat. I also know that MOSTLY being married means less sex for MOST couples.  As for me  Well I am asexual these days..so NO sex for me per se....for MONTHS ...Well that is the new normal for us....

lol should i feel lucky..its just our normal...i find it sad that married couples are not having more sex...if you are having sex once a month it sounds like its a chore(thank goodness its over for another month).....if i could be so bold and ask how you became asexual ...was it a slow process..or was it a sudden decision..and then what brings on the desire again....

@haveusbc    You asked why  I am claiming on being asexual...LMAO....okay Here goes.

Some people will say you are only BORN being asexual.

Some will say a big trauma made you asexual.

Some might claim, asexuality is NOT caused by any chemical imbalance.

I believe your own sexuality can be decided by you (in the manner that people should not tell you what you are, rather you can decide that for yourself). This also means you can decide whether you believe it is a choice, you are born with it, or a mixture. It`s up to you. Some will say that you cannot choose, at all. I say it is up to you how you would like to perceive it, and how you wish to experience it. It should also be remembered that people change over the course of their life, and this means many things can change, including sexuality. A person should also remember that Asexuals are not afraid of intimacy. Many asexuals want and are in relationships, with not only other asexuals, but sexual people as well. I claim that it is due to my menopause. Anyone who wants to differ is MOST welcome to say so! Or anyone who has more facts, please do share!

Choosing to say I am asexual does not take the fact away that I will always remain a tactile person, I love touch I love cuddling....and it seems my dirty mind has not changed at all!

Hope this answers your question

mmmmmmm,

I think I should check if I have this thing you call "sex addiction" . . . . . . 

And if I do not, well then, I NEED to get me some  . . 

OK, OK, OK . . . seriously, I am in agreement with the "choose what you are" suggestion made by PIB . . . but there are those who need a little guidance when it cones to choosing . . . always the possibility of one "trying" to be a certain way. 

FOR EXAMPLE:

Some would say if you are involved in a mmf then you are gay, some would say you are bi, some would say you are a pervert . . . I would say, YES !!! 

@SDM   Why hello Mr SDM. Man, I miss the *R* part of your previous *nick* I still somehow think of you as SDMR. 

Anyways I think a LOT of people, mostly men will not think sex addiction could be bad for you, and would love to be addicted. Mostly I think most men are sorta *dependant* on sex itself!!! At least a little stroking is needed once a day if not twice, if no intercourse is available, or am I wrong??

Well someone who is really, REALLY addicted to sex, will soon know it! As their lives takes a turn for the bad and they spiral out of control, heck of their whole being, and that of their family. I am sure not anyone would really  like being addicted to sex per se, just the thought of having sex at least once a day if not twice, is most men`s fantasy.  So I am sure, I will not wish this condition on anyone.

As for *trying* to be something you are not....I do believe everyone should at least try anything they have a fantasy about, EXCEPT (kids and animals and true ). Only by trying everything and experimenting one can decide what  you as a person like and who you are.

But I also know some people use a description word for themselves, without really knowing what it means and then when the reality presents itself they balk and dissapear.(thinking kink again  Dominant and slave and submissive and switch.  If I might elaborate, double penetration for men, MOST men do not realize that being inside a lady together, they ARE going to touch, their balls will slam against each other, and most importantly, they WILL feel each others cocks through the thin barrier of the perineum between the anal chanel and the vagina. and yes sometimes a cock slips OUT, and one of the males has to put it back!!! and it might just not be the one who that cock belongs to. Or am I wrong?? Now they go and say they are not even bi friendly.....  ermm  excuse me!!!!!!!

I luv chem bareback  sex sex.i can go on fucking for hours

@pertrio69   To each their own enjoyment...Anyway thank you for giving your opinion and input, you are always welcome to partake,even if it is not always in agreement with anyone else, it does happen , so do not shy away from joining us....

For me to use any chemical to enhance a sexual interlude is just a No-No... as for using poppers (as a chem) well I did smell a popper and to me it smells like horse pee.... not sure what poppers really do for someone...but like I said to each their own.

As for bareback these days...also  far too big a risk in my eyes, except if it is  with your own life partner. NOT that I can go bareback...as it is M on M situation....but still going with out a condom is/was just to risky for me.

I'm not even much of a swinger but defiantly a sex addict. Sex addiction is a funny one because it doesn't damage your body so just if it starts to affect your life. However I think deep down inside every swinger knows they are a sex addict .... denial is not just a river in egypt