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Sensitivity

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SDM
Sex God
My question is as follows: Are you as sensitive to sexual situations as you are to day to day life situations? Somebody tells me I Lick wrong, I respond "how do you want me to do it?" Somebody tells me my views about something are wrong, I respond defensively . . . . .
Unknown User
I have a sort of passive aggressive personality. I am known to blow of steam VERY easily and very fast , but when I have said my say, I do forgive the other person just as easily. UNTIL the next time around. I also have to say I dislike conflict, I sidestep it if I can. I am however been shown time and time again NOT to take sides with anyone, it just blows up in my face. Knowing myself and what I am capable off, I try NOT ever to become to angry, I might just loose my cool completely and the offending person will walk away with bodily harm. And then I am NO lady!! and I try very hard to be one. I also possess a VERY colorful language,IF I use it,it will shame a , no lady trades there. It goes with out saying that with playmates I am MORE sensitive, I have to be or else I would not make a good *Top* or Domme. I am always open to suggestions and improvements. Sadly I have to say some people never has a nice thing to say to and about others,and never tries to be diplomatic at all. Sometimes I find people with a *little* authority misuses it badly and that in itself does more bad than good. I work in a environment where communications are top priority , BUT even there with people who is suppose to have *people skills* people are really lacking!!! But then we are all just human and fail able the whole lot of us!!!
Unknown User
The way the criticism is given makes a huge difference. In a sexual situation, the other person would probably give you direction more than just flat out tell you that you're doing it wrong. That's what makes for good sex - harder, softer, deeper.... We guide each other to the best possible outcome. It's possible that we take offence to what is being said to us more because of the way it is said, than by what the person is actually saying.
Unknown User
Don't know the feeling cos I am never wrong so never get told I am... bwa haaaaa ha!!!
Unknown User
Quote by SDMR
My question is as follows:
Are you as sensitive to sexual situations as you are to day to day life situations?
Somebody tells me I Lick wrong, I respond "how do you want me to do it?"
Somebody tells me my views about something are wrong, I respond defensively . . . . .

I lot of people, yourself included, embed Who they are in their view points and opinions. This is usually a sign of a well matured and strongly anchored individual.
Unfortunately this also means when someone questions a view point of yours, it can feel like a personal attack.
You don't define who you are by how you lick though.
If you don't mind a little free coaching, I know you better than I know most of the others on the forums, so from our conversations, I would venture that you have a more balanced and emotionally mature behaviour pattern in your attitude to your sex life and that it would lower your stress levels and improve your general happiness levels to try and be as open and willing to learn in other facets of your life too. You certainly have the capacity: you're a swinger!
I expect someone in your life has judged you harshly for your opinions and your view points, someone whose opinion mattered a lot, and so now that's a hot button for you. It's pretty common. Mine's, if someone suggests I'm not good enough, though it's rather a specific context.
If you're aware of it though, you can train yourself to react differently, strategically, to design the outcome of interactions, even if there is a possibility of someone pushing your hot button.
Unknown User
I like the odd wank! lol
katniss
Warming the Bed
Quote by Irish
I like the odd wank! lol

you - my dear Irish - are just odd :lol:
i just saw your forum avatar and got very distracted innocent
SDM
Sex God
Quote by delway
The way the criticism is given makes a huge difference.
In a sexual situation, the other person would probably give you direction more than just flat out tell you that you're doing it wrong. That's what makes for good sex - harder, softer, deeper.... We guide each other to the best possible outcome.
It's possible that we take offence to what is being said to us more because of the way it is said, than by what the person is actually saying.

It's also possible that the person says something to us (content & manner) based on their interpretation.
SDM
Sex God
Quote by Stamina
Don't know the feeling cos I am never wrong so never get told I am... bwa haaaaa ha!!!

Clearly you have not read the vast majority of responses to your various forum postings . . .
SDM
Sex God
Quote by LeeEC
.

If you don't mind a little free coaching, I know you better than I know most of the others on the forums, so from our conversations, I would venture that you have a more balanced and emotionally mature behaviour pattern in your attitude to your sex life and that it would lower your stress levels and improve your general happiness levels to try and be as open and willing to learn in other facets of your life too. You certainly have the capacity: you're a swinger!
I am more than open to learn, at any time on any subject. The general pattern though, usually seems to be that any person on the teaching side, simply wants to tell me what/how/when . . . and I should simply accept as such. If I have a specific view point on something, hopefully it is not one I just sucked out of nowhere. So to simply tell me to change my view without giving me reasoning that could change my initially formed view point, would obviously generate the impression that I have an unwillingness to grow / learn / change.
So, give me reasons / explanations / convincing facts and I would like to think that I am very open to seeing things differently.
SDM
Sex God
Quote by Irish
I like the odd wank! lol

It would appear Irish is of the opinion we are talking Moo Poo rotflmao
SDM
Sex God
Quote by LeeEC
My question is as follows:
Are you as sensitive to sexual situations as you are to day to day life situations?
Somebody tells me I Lick wrong, I respond "how do you want me to do it?"
Somebody tells me my views about something are wrong, I respond defensively . . . . .

I expect someone in your life has judged you harshly for your opinions and your view points, someone whose opinion mattered a lot, and so now that's a hot button for you. It's pretty common. Mine's, if someone suggests I'm not good enough, though it's rather a specific context.
If you're aware of it though, you can train yourself to react differently, strategically, to design the outcome of interactions, even if there is a possibility of someone pushing your hot button.
I repeat,
"somebody TELL's me my views about something are wrong, I respond defensively"
"somebody SHOW's me my views about something are wrong . . . . . . . . . .
Unknown User
Quote by SDMR
Don't know the feeling cos I am never wrong so never get told I am... bwa haaaaa ha!!!

Clearly you have not read the vast majority of responses to your various forum postings . . .
I have read the vast majority of responses to all my posts... they are wrong and I am right! lol :lol:
Unknown User
Me thinks delway gave the BEST answer here!!! short and sweet. It is not the telling off that really matters it is the HOW it is done. @ Stamina.. Man you surely do have a great self-esteem and ego !!!!!!!