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Put off by the races

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Well technically on Linkedin I see it daily. Its called broad based black economic empowerment and is described as employmemt equity postions available. Not bitching about it. But yeah they're there. Its the reason I started my own company actually. Companies wouldnt hire me because I didnt add value to their BEE certificate. So I figured fck'em. I'll do my own thing. Only mentioning since you asked.

I find this debate interesting and instructive. Interesting in that there are perspectives and experiences from different ethnic groups and instructive in the sense that I  have learnt something more about society and its views on racism. It just goes to show that SH is not only about finding partners of whatever preference you choose but I have not seen any aggressive or distasteful language.

This tells me we can discuss subjects of any natures and be adult about it. No one is right and no one is wrong... we are all just different

Quote by 2some4fun
Well technically on Linkedin I see it daily. Its called broad based black economic empowerment and is described as employmemt equity postions available. Not bitching about it. But yeah they're there. Its the reason I started my own company actually. Companies wouldnt hire me because I didnt add value to their BEE certificate. So I figured fck'em. I'll do my own thing. Only mentioning since you asked.

 I am not arguing the merits of Employment Equity and this is not the question I asked at all because EE based hiring IS socially acceptable in the real world.

The question was -  If we as a modern society collectively agree this wrong in the real world, then why are we so quick to defend this behaviour on SH? 


Defending this behaviour is different from expressing a preference

Quote by playfulpeeps
Quote by 2some4fun
Well technically on Linkedin I see it daily. Its called broad based black economic empowerment and is described as employmemt equity postions available. Not bitching about it. But yeah they're there. Its the reason I started my own company actually. Companies wouldnt hire me because I didnt add value to their BEE certificate. So I figured fck'em. I'll do my own thing. Only mentioning since you asked.
 I am not arguing the merits of Employment Equity and this is not the question I asked at all because EE based hiring IS socially acceptable in the real world.
The question was -  If we as a modern society collectively agree this wrong in the real world, then why are we so quick to defend this behaviour on SH? 


 Trying to rationalize human behavior and comparing it across platforms like LinkedIn and Facebook is absurd. Those are commercial intended for business or social intended for friendly/vanilla interactions. SH is one where people market for fucking. To expect behavior across all platforms to be equal is ridiculous and you're reaching. 

I tell you what - go and post on your FB and LinkedIn that you're looking for black guys to fuck your wife and THEN we'll talk. Till then - your argument is mute.

Quote by 2some4fun
Quote by playfulpeeps
Quote by 2some4fun
Well technically on Linkedin I see it daily. Its called broad based black economic empowerment and is described as employmemt equity postions available. Not bitching about it. But yeah they're there. Its the reason I started my own company actually. Companies wouldnt hire me because I didnt add value to their BEE certificate. So I figured fck'em. I'll do my own thing. Only mentioning since you asked.
 I am not arguing the merits of Employment Equity and this is not the question I asked at all because EE based hiring IS socially acceptable in the real world.
The question was -  If we as a modern society collectively agree this wrong in the real world, then why are we so quick to defend this behaviour on SH? 
 Trying to rationalize human behavior and comparing it across platforms like LinkedIn and Facebook is absurd. Those are commercial intended for business or social intended for friendly/vanilla interactions. SH is one where people market for fucking. To expect behavior across all platforms to be equal is ridiculous and you're reaching. 
I tell you what - go and post on your FB and LinkedIn that you're looking for black guys to fuck your wife and THEN we'll talk. Till then - your argument is mute.

 

Based on this pattern of replies from you I can only hope you can see the flaws in your arguments above.  Every reply above was your attempt to rationalize overt racism to homosexuality, sexual preference, fee choice and rejection yet now we cannot rationalise human behaviour across platforms?  I hope you are genuinely trolling as the kids say.

Your argument above does not making any of my points moot as once again you failed to address the the core issue.  

However if by mute you mean you will stop making the same unrelated arguments over and over again then I can say agreed and thank you! 

I believe the question was clear but I will restate it just for you

If you prefer to be friends with only people from your race, would you state "white friends only" of FB?.

 If you only socialise only white people in the real world would you put up a sign in front of you house or Church that reads "no other races allowed"?

This question was initially rhetorical but now I am genuinely interested in your answer.

People have free will to associate. That free will extends to their decision making and freedom of speech. If it is their will to advertise on their Facebook that they don't like whites - then power to them. Since you asked a question - I will answer and I hope you'll afford me the same courtesy. I don't have FB. But if I did and if my choice in life was to only mix with whites - then yes I would state so on that platform. I might not be as overt as some of the profiles on here. Having reasonable command of your birth language affords many the opportunity to practise tact and I would hope that my sensitivity in handling my life choice would be accepted by the reader. 

The day we are constrained from voicing our preferences any ANY platform is the day our democracy dies. If people feel offended that other people, of a different demographic to them, have the right to say clearly and unambiguously on their Swinging Heaven profile that they don't want to fuck people of other persuasions - then the issue in all sincerity sits with the that special snowflake. They would be well advised to go read section 16 of our constitution. If they struggle to read it - they should ask somebody with an IQ above 70 to help them. Furthermore, if they think that bitching about how other people go about voicing their preferences is going to change the hearts and minds of the very people that don't want to fuck them... they are sadly mistaken and bound to spend many miserable hours on this or any other platform. 

As already stated - as a couple we have no issue with, and HAVE played across colour lines. What we do have issue with;  is your assertion that people should not be allowed to make their racial preferences known if they feel that strongly about it. They don't want to waste their, or anybody else's time. 

Have you updated your Linkedin and FB profiles yet?


Quote by 2some4fun
People have free will to associate. That free will extends to their decision making and freedom of speech. If it is their will to advertise on their Facebook that they don't like whites - then power to them. Since you asked a question - I will answer and I hope you'll afford me the same courtesy. I don't have FB. But if I did and if my choice in life was to only mix with whites - then yes I would state so on that platform. I might not be as overt as some of the profiles on here. Having reasonable command of your birth language affords many the opportunity to practise tact and I would hope that my sensitivity in handling my life choice would be accepted by the reader. 
The day we are constrained from voicing our preferences any ANY platform is the day our democracy dies. If people feel offended that other people, of a different demographic to them, have the right to say clearly and unambiguously on their Swinging Heaven profile that they don't want to fuck other people of their same persuasion - then the issue in all sincerity sits with the that special snowflake. They would be well advised to go read section 16 of our constitution. If they struggle to read it - they should ask somebody with an IQ above 70 to help them. Furthermore, if they think that bitching about how other people go about voicing their preferences is going to change the hearts and minds of the very people that don't want to fuck them... they are sadly mistaken and bound to spend many miserable hours on this or any other platform. 

As already stated - as a couple we have no issue with, and HAVE played across colour lines. What we do have issue with;  is your assertion that people should not be allowed to make their racial preferences known if they feel that strongly about it. They don't want to waste their, or anybody else's time. 
Have you updated your Linkedin and FB profiles yet?



 

Ok you have said a lot of things there but to summarize again you believe that if you only want to socialize with “whites only” then it is your right to make it publicly known, by updating you public profile on any platform and erecting “whites only signs” outside your house and or church. 

You believe that if you are not allowed to do this then it goes against the South African constitution and your right to free speech.

thank you for clarifying your position.


I have 2 points of advice for you:


Firstly when quoting the constitution, maybe to start with section 9. Equality, maybe glance over section 10. Human dignity and of course when you read section 16 maybe not skip over part 2c freedom of expression does not extend to the advocacy of hatred that is based on race, ethnicity.

Secondly and finally your belief  that personal freedoms and liberties to be racist on public platforms unfortunately contravenes PEPUDA and is against the law. In fact This is not a South African thing. To my knowledge the EU and Australia have laws in place which make you belief illegal m.  I know you were being Hyperbolic to make a point but it is illegal and morally wrong. Period 

 





it seems people on this thread want  people to confirm of there way of thinking..really a bit silly isnt it....be gentle if i dont agree with you point of view 

Quote by Scirrocco
"You can only wake the person up who is sleeping. you cannot wake the one who is pretending to sleep". We all have our own preferences in life. Is there is any point of bill-boarding them in public? One can  respectfully decline other advances. You do not need to take loudspeaker and shout out loud. We can clearly hear  see things..


 @Scirrocco thank you for this quote..   The sentiment could not have come at a better time and it really shifted my perspective on the points of argument.

I believe the diverging POVs are adequately represented and I will refrain from commenting further

I wish you all well and have a great week end


Quote by fadnad
The thing of race for me some couples put it Der for other couples to accept them we have played with many couples who say do not cross the racial barrier but what irritates me is those couples that say we don’t cross but will send you a msg saying can we play with your wife 

@Fadnad - its tribute/testament to your hotness.  Let's face it, considering your build you could pass for either 
a) a person of mixed heritage
b) Caucasian but with a really good tan;)

A few observations if I may

This thread overall runs the risk of either
a) becoming "just another" thread about race
b) turning into a pyrrhic victory for @playfulppes in that its unlikely to provoke anyone into thinking "golly geez, I need to slow/change" my roll.

At the end of the day, all of this is about perspective.  On certain platforms, people feel empowered to say certain things.  On others, not so much. On certain platforms people will be called out for certain things, on others they won't be. On this platform its okay to implicitly say "don't message me if you are another race" but at the same time many but not all profiles are silent as to "don't message me if you cannot be polite and respectful".

At the same time PoohC in another thread pointed out that many of us of colour would not put "love afrikaans music on our FB profiles". A comment like that is thought provoking given the amount of judgement circulating in the Afr community.  I have attended Metallica concerts but opted not to do Rammstein or Five Finger Death Punch because well....would I be safe in an environment like that? So putting "love Rammstein, Metallica and Five Finger Death Punch" on my FB is no biggie. Leaving a concert on a stretcher after a run in with Skinheads R Us would be.


Is it possible that there is a bigger question here which is do sentiments such as "no interracial" prejudice the posters more than the readers?  Eminem is probably one of the greatest poets of our time but there are those who will not give him  the time of day because he chose Rap rather than Pop or Country to express himself.  What of Run The Jewels? An ebony and ivory duo whose music is very deep and speaks largely of the black condition in America. Their medium is rap/hip hop yet as far as I have seen most of their concert attendees(aka very enthusiastic fans) are white.



Speaking of Run the Jewels Switch off annotations otherwise they will obscure the punchline of the video

To the forum admins - I will admit to not being 100% aware of what is and is not allowed to be posted here and accordingly apologise for any rule breaking in advance.

Is a straight person not wanting to have sex with a man homophobic ? You see the problem, surely. Preference is, by definition, non-inclusive. On all levels.

Quote by candace_slut_starr
I have to AGREE, it is kinda racist . " We dont cross the racial barrier".  Since when does race have a barrier? In this age to still be racist , Wow.....not cool.

 I was blocked by 3 couples once when I changed my status to only coloured and black women allowed... Think I hit a nerve and offended some white people... And they made it known in the chat room that I was personally wrong for my choices... Go figure... What's good for the goose should be good for the gander 

It's interesting to notice how much conversation this thread has generated next to the threads about other swinging-related topics. I suppose that in itself displays how immediate the question of race still is, in our land.

I think that "Freedom of Expression" is a good idea, and that this freedom is not something we should suppress simply because we don't agree with whatever it is that we are reading. ( Yes, It's clear that all rights, including expression are not absolute - we do know that, too) - So, as long as your speech does not rise to "Hate Speech" and you do not actively call for obviously illegal activity of any kind - you are free to publish and of course bare the consequences to your reputation if you are seriously unfashionable.

How revealing is it to read " We do not cross the racial barrier"...in a member's profile. Or - " It's just our preference - sorry"...and inclusions such as this. However distasteful, narrow-minded, bigoted, and frankly stupid it looks - at least you know what you are dealing with. Better to be openly racist rather than hide in the closet, no? 

My personal favorite though, was from a couple who wrote on this site -  "We do not cross the rascal barrier"... I absolutely loved it. I thought to myself " What a pity, I LOVE crossing the rascal barrier" - that's where all the real people are - across the rascal barrier. What rascals.

We can get together and have inter-rascal sex, anytime. :-)

Paspartout.



O dear.....lots and lots of hurt feelings here. You will ALWAYS get people with their own preferences. You have a best friend from another race, you braai over weekends, your kids grow up together, you go on holidays with them, you basically become extended family, there for each other through thick and thin. You want to get them into bed but but they don't want to as they are not into interracial sex, does that make them racist? Are they racist because they are exercising their constitutional right to sexually associate themselves with someone of their preference despite the fact that you are basically family?


Trying to prescribe to anyone who and how they should socialise with in their personal lives is a slippery slope and people will defend that personal right (as enshrined in the constitution).


So what if there is a "only whites" clause on their profile? It just gives you an idea of whether you want to associate with them or not. What people write on their profiles is outside of your circle of influence, and worrying about it only damages you with high blood pressure and stress. Is it worth while getting upset about it when you could rather spend that energy in a more constructive way?

Another interesting one is those who dont complete the ethnicity part of their profiles, wonder why? 

Quote by Scirrocco
"You can only wake the person up who is sleeping. you cannot wake the one who is pretending to sleep". We all have our own preferences in life. Is there is any point of bill-boarding them in public? One can  respectfully decline other advances. You do not need to take loudspeaker and shout out loud. We can clearly hear  see things..

 Problem is, once you politely decline you are still labeled as a racist, because "how dare you refuse to socialise or get intimate with people of other races." 🙂 

Quote by playfulpeeps
Quote by 2some4fun
People have free will to associate. That free will extends to their decision making and freedom of speech. If it is their will to advertise on their Facebook that they don't like whites - then power to them. Since you asked a question - I will answer and I hope you'll afford me the same courtesy. I don't have FB. But if I did and if my choice in life was to only mix with whites - then yes I would state so on that platform. I might not be as overt as some of the profiles on here. Having reasonable command of your birth language affords many the opportunity to practise tact and I would hope that my sensitivity in handling my life choice would be accepted by the reader. 
The day we are constrained from voicing our preferences any ANY platform is the day our democracy dies. If people feel offended that other people, of a different demographic to them, have the right to say clearly and unambiguously on their Swinging Heaven profile that they don't want to fuck other people of their same persuasion - then the issue in all sincerity sits with the that special snowflake. They would be well advised to go read section 16 of our constitution. If they struggle to read it - they should ask somebody with an IQ above 70 to help them. Furthermore, if they think that bitching about how other people go about voicing their preferences is going to change the hearts and minds of the very people that don't want to fuck them... they are sadly mistaken and bound to spend many miserable hours on this or any other platform. 

As already stated - as a couple we have no issue with, and HAVE played across colour lines. What we do have issue with;  is your assertion that people should not be allowed to make their racial preferences known if they feel that strongly about it. They don't want to waste their, or anybody else's time. 
Have you updated your Linkedin and FB profiles yet?
 

Ok you have said a lot of things there but to summarize again you believe that if you only want to socialize with “whites only” then it is your right to make it publicly known, by updating you public profile on any platform and erecting “whites only signs” outside your house and or church. 
You believe that if you are not allowed to do this then it goes against the South African constitution and your right to free speech.
thank you for clarifying your position.

I have 2 points of advice for you:

Firstly when quoting the constitution, maybe to start with section 9. Equality, maybe glance over section 10. Human dignity and of course when you read section 16 maybe not skip over part 2c freedom of expression does not extend to the advocacy of hatred that is based on race, ethnicity.
Secondly and finally your belief  that personal freedoms and liberties to be racist on public platforms unfortunately contravenes PEPUDA and is against the law. In fact This is not a South African thing. To my knowledge the EU and Australia have laws in place which make you belief illegal m.  I know you were being Hyperbolic to make a point but it is illegal and morally wrong. Period 
 







 Like I said, you CANNOT and will never be able to force anybody to change their preferences, whether they state it publically or not.

I bet even if someone has not made a public statement regarding preference and you contact them and get rejected, you will label them as racist, am I right?

Racial profiling others it is not good at all especially in platform like this. Where we say we are 'Open minded people' it shouldn't be profile but discussed amongst swingers as preference while we are engaging. 


The way it is right just pure race issue thing that encourages 'racist comments'

So all of you that's married to the same race has publicly announce that you rasist unless you married to a different race 

Wow can't believe I missed this one. 


Must say I fully understand the frustration. But I would like to say something on the topic. 

People have preferences yes, and rules and regulations and and and..... But as I have said before any limitation you put on, only limits the fun you could have. 

If you want to have limits imposed on you by archaic laws, social norms or just plain prejudice.... Then enjoy. But I can tell you life is so much more fun when you let it all go 

We just feel that all black cock matter.

So we have decided a long time ago that we will play with all cultures. 

It just gave us so much more erotic and sexy experiences. 

Just love the new swinging South Africa 

So many more friends to meet 

Quote by 2some4fun

Well technically on Linkedin I see it daily. Its called broad based black economic empowerment and is described as employmemt equity postions available. Not bitching about it. But yeah they're there. Its the reason I started my own company actually. Companies wouldnt hire me because I didnt add value to their BEE certificate. So I figured fck'em. I'll do my own thing. Only mentioning since you asked.

You should get any newspaper from the early 80s when jobs were advertised for whites only ( bbe ) but for whites.

We have come across a few profiles that "don't cross the race barrier" and we understand that completely, Mr is white and prefers to cross the barrier, preference is preference. But as soon as you add "and won't play with anyone who does cross the race barrier" then sorry we can't defend that, you letting your racism show

Quote by ladysexy

You should get any newspaper from the early 80s when jobs were advertised for whites only ( bbe ) but for whites.

"Only a fool trips on what’s behind him" - Monica Murphy.

Does that equate to a straight person not interested in gay sex as being homophobic?

Hi guys if you think of it if we play safe and use condoms what is the difference between white yellow brown black dick in a condom. It's your choice who you play with so why advertise same race only where if people send you an invite just don't expect them if they are not not kind colour that stays your decision. Because we don't play with some white people that's not our tipe but we don't put on our bio we are only looking for some couples with this and this no we filter that's why the group is here to meet all kinds of people and it's not to say that people you meet is the people you will play with. Stop judging people by race colour and degrees we are all human. The quicker we start realizing it the better the fucked up country will be.

It is called freedom of choice