we have been on this site for 2 months ..the thing that frustrates us most is :
1. Men that advertise as a couple but their wives are not into this scene ..
The time you find out is only when the date is supposed to happen or when we socialise or meet them and hear the wife say that she is not into this ...where is their communication ??? worst yet is when the wife does not know he is on the site advertising as a couple and finds out ..and then he deletes his profile cos she is not into swinging at all ...He reopens one as a single ..really now ...
Guys have the balls to be honest cos you want honesty back ....
Couple_1
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Pretenders
Yes quite. You'll notice our profile says upfront "don't bother" if that's the case.
I DO NOT like being dragged into other peoples' marital drama
But you know what - a thread that indicates the offenders or perhaps one that highlights the REAL couples and your support of them, might help the rest of us
LeeEC
Orgasminator
The problem of honesty is that 50% and more of the people on the site newer learn what honesty means or how to live like that, sorry and i think thats a sickness in the new SA because morals fly out of the window.
Warming the Bed
..........................and COMMUNICATION!!
Is it immoral to be a swinger? Well, yes, if you're religious fundamentalist and strongly believe that it's Biblically immoral. (You definitely don't know what you're missing out on if that's you) Then again you wouldn't be a swinger, would you? And you certainly would not be reading this! Before there's a storm of protest and indignation we just need to state that religion and spirituality is an individual and personal issue and should not be a part of the equation, as indeed with politics.
As swingers at the outset of our incredible adventure we made a pact with each other: we will be, and are, totally honest with one another and we communicate openly and without reservation with each other and those couples we swing with. In that regard we 'lay down the law', as it were, when we meet new couples.
Questions are posed: Are you BOTH totally comfortable with swinging? What are your preferences, likes and dislikes? Will you respect them, as we do? NO means NO, and YES means Oh, fuck, yes, please!!!
With us there is not an iota of thought whether we are being moral or immoral. The norms of society have definitely brainwashed us into the sanctity of monogamous marriage and the whole white picket fence purity of so-called wholesome relationships. This is all good and well, and we agree that the bond between a swinging couple is the essence of a GREAT swinging couple.
So we like to fuck each other as well as other swingers. Who is the judge of whether society accepts such behaviour? Our conscience is clear because we are totally comfortable - mentally - with swinging. And all because of HONEST and open communication with each other and our fellow swingers.
It is not about morality but people who fantasize about things they have read about and want to experiance it as well and dont have the courage to be honest about it
Lots of these couples the wife was never involved
Most of the bi wives are just the husbands fantasy
It actually becomes easy to read the profiles, see who ticks all the blocks, try chatting to some of them, all goes well until they have an orgasm and then you never hear from them again
Something interesting:
In biblical times there was a writer named Johannes who advocated thet if the Husband could not satisfy her, wether with child or he was to old etc she could have another man attend to her needs, with his approval of course
The above from studies a pastor friend did and she took great pleasure in "shocking" us with titbits out of her study material
Not sure to post on this subject or the 'Lust/Swinging' subject - there's definitely a connection! (the frustrations of the serious swinger) - will post here and see how it goes!
Thx Voyer1105 for bringing back the balance in this 'debate'!
I almost thought I'm doing the wrong thing being on this site!
How did most couples start? Honestly? I can pick it up in almost all profiles where the lady made the swinging vote! (no pun intended) Ladies rule I learnt on this site!
I would like to M&G (thx PIB for teaching me some short hand!) more couples to learn the finer nuances to get my lady involved as I know for a fact that we would be a wonderful contribution to any interested couple. But for now I have to work through all the the picky, the good, the bad and the 'ugly fake' profiles (again no pun intended!) to find my way to the perfect world of Swinging!
Anybody interested?
I agree with the honesty bit
I joined the site just to look around, not looking for any sexual action, and maybe meet some men who I could possibly introduce to my wife
Without trying I now have a number of friends and when possible I end up arranging events for them and have had some very randy action
The moral of the story........ crunch time is the place to be. The sooner you get to it the quicker you can sort out the chaff, and get on with the things that float your boat ......e.g. like all the lusty things that swinging is all about!
As a salesperson (honest one btw! ;-)) for the greater part of my life I get it all the time! Have your initial Q's ready in your Toolbox of tricks ..... and voila!
Quote by Couple_1
Thanks guys ...we seem to be able to sift the good , from the bad ...and lets hope we get as refined as you guys
Should you have a good tips please feel free to mail us
Thanks again ..have a sexy week-end
Couple_1
It's all a learning curve! I still learn new things as going along! It takes time but definately worth it when you find your right couple/single!
hi there
well we would like to just put our 50cent in here.
we have been looking and looking on this site and let us tell you the most of the people on this site are looking for models be it man or lady!!!!!! once we did set up a meeting with a cpl but the people did not confirm the date they said so we thought that the meeting was off. the day of the meeting the people send a message, sending us their cell number, but we did not login that day until late the afternoon due to things that took place that day, so the decent thing to do was to phone the people to say sorry, and gave the reasons why we could not meet them in any case. O,boy was the guy unpleasant. so it was just as well that things did go wrong.
now i did go into each ones profile that has had something to say and it is interesting that the people that answered is all over is s.a. and most are too mature or the males are bi.
now the reason why i mentioned this is because a person looks for the cpl or person you think may match with your age group and ideas. well it seems to me in life the chance that is happening, is one in a hundred am i right or wrong?
so it is now going on for 6 years for us, trying to find a cpl close to what we are looking for. and my word, we will not give up, because when we do find the right cpl it will hopefully turn into a good relationship--------------to all of those that get up set don't give up keep looking like us 
Yes, it is a learning curve...
Of course for those in smaller communities it gets even harder because in a smaller communitiy the chances of finding friends are even less and the risk fo discovery damaging vanilla friendships or even jeopardising business are so much greater.
You will hear people in PE saying that it's such a "small" place... imagine being from Alberton or Koffiefontein guys!!
Have a heart people!! For the love of swingers, will someone please start a holiday resort for us!!
:cool:
:cheers:
you are right about that rule. we are not referring to that rule. we read on one of the forums about something that happened at sandy beach where a cpl went to to the beach and the guys came up to the cpl and stood there playing with they self's. that is the kind of thing we are referring to when we say rules any suggestion. now that we have explained.
but any case thank you for your input.
Quote by joyrider
i would like to do it in jhb but i think there is already tooo many clubs that came up and then go bang. on the coast i can always make plans not in jhb
Well if you want a niche market - the obvious place to start would be the Eastern cape - there are NO clubs/party venues advertised on ANY swinging sites at all (there are private clubs, I'm told, but I've never seen actual evidence of this, so I suspect it's all the usual BS).
Sad part is we are probably the best situated to do this on our rural property (central to the EC, away from towns/cities/neighbours) - we just don't have the capital to do the development.... Sigh.... Economy....
Any well-endowed investors out there?
LeeEC
