We would like to add: we do not judge your moral choices nor your reasons for making those choices. We would kindly request that you do not taint or disrespect our culture?
... And I am a hypocrite? All you have done in your posts aimed at me is judge!
With great enthusiasm have i been reading through many postings on even more varied subjects after discovering the Forum a few days ago, that after trawling the Personals and new Members almost religiously for months since becoming a member myself. My views on the subject and lifestyle in general is 100% aligned with the esteemed member Stamina - as I am a very similar (dis)position to him. Very much married, happy at that, with two lovely teenagers. My wife is not the swinging type, have touched on the subject and big no no. Unfortunately us humans are different and i did not know 16 years ago that i would find the lifestyle appealing! Perhaps did not even know of its existence!
But here we are, and being who and what we are. Being a Leo, my motto is to always make the best of what you have as you are unlikely to change to suit all concerned. So my outlet to fullfill my (ridiculous?) desires to be physical with other women is on this and some similar sites where I believe like minded people do actually meet, and do what they want to without being judged or judging. Connection is not easily achieved and many intended meetings fail to happen, but the thrill of the chase provides some level of oxytocin release even if it only stimulates the next chase.
If I stop being philosophical for a moment, I really do believe there are ladies out there who experience the same desires and their spouses may not share the ideas, so this would provide a perfect release for them as well. They might not want to risk the SINGLE suitor to become emotionally attached to them and jeopardize their own relationships.
Moderators - how about creating a new category for us so called 'cheaters' who value our vanilla lives and families much more than our own (potential) happiness by finding the unicorn as a life partner? This way we (guys and girls) would not be ostracized before other "lifestylers" even take the trouble to get to know us!
Thanks for your retraction Stamina and my apologies if I came accross as judgmental, however, in the strictest sense of the word I am/was judging. I am not judging the fact that you (or anyone else) is cheating nor am I judging the reasons that you (or anyone else) have made the choice to cheat. I am/was judging your description of your relationship and as a lifestyle purist (for lack of a better word), I am saying that the foundation of our lifestyle beliefs is that your significant other is on board with your activities and that some (not you) "cheaters" do their level-headed best to disrespect our view/choice/beliefs.
Quite simply from our point of view we cannot conceive of hurting another person (through having a sexual encounter) without cause and, we believe, that would be exactly what we are doing to the ignorant significant other.
Beliefs and principles aside, we have also seen the very real outcome of a cheater being caught and his spouse's reaction to the third parties involved which included legal action and threats of bodily harm.
I just don't ever want to be part of the reason for that wife's pain who has to find out what their partners have been up to.
in this instance!)