Being a member on this site has the wheels in my head turning...
Swinging is when a couple has an open relationship. One couple meets with another couple and for all intensive purposes - have some good clean adult fun, right? Now obviously, both parties of a couple are on the same page... Both give consent to each other to engage in sexual acts with another person. But this has me thinking... Where did it start? Did hubby suggest the lifestyle, or did missus? And was the initial suggestion maybe for personal gain?
Maybe hubby is bored with his wife and because he does not want to be unfaithful, suggests the lifestyle because he wants to bang other woman. Maybe Missus has this motive? Don't get me wrong, I am not saying all swingers do this but I do believe that some do. Scenario: Hubby is tired of the same old thing with the same woman year after year... Suggests to wife that swinging will "spice things up" for both of them. She agrees, thinking that his heart belongs only to her... But he knows he is being dishonest. He gets "new pussy" every now and then and that his only motive...
How many of you ladies are in this lifestyle with your husbands and you "know" that his intentions are pure? Your perfect "loving" relationship with your husbands are transparent? How many of you men are married to an "honest" woman and you love the fact that she is in the lifestyle because she is sexually confident? She loves you and only you, but likes the occasional "new willy"? Maybe she does not have the heart to tell you that one man is not enough for her, and you believe that it simply "spicing things up" for the both of you...
Could some swingers maybe be cheating in plain sight?
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Is swinging always honest as apposed to cheating?
Orgasminator
Miss here and I can with now doubt in my mind said I love my hubby and we also love the lifestyle.
Orgasminator
True swinging is about honesty and respect for you partner, anything less will soon be found out and the relationship will suffer.
Swinging isn't a justification for cheating and cheating can never be swinging.
Sex God
A lot usage of the word love in your write up Stamina.
For a couple top be able to "Swing" successfully, the "love" has to be in the right place, at the right level etc. I just seem to get a feeling from your post of the two being confused.
If as couple is not 100% sure, then the best thing would be to wait a little longer.
But then again, Swinging in a relationship may also curb the desire to cheat, but again, the relationship would have to be right. Ok, so as I'm writing I'm finding pro's & con's with my own thinking . . . . . . So, bottom line my 12 cents worth is "don't confuse love with sex" (in the swinging context)
Swinging if there is a lack of love or respect will soon have the marriage/relationship solidly on the rocks. That is basically when one or both is looking out for something else without having the guts to end the existing relationship first, don't confuse this with swinging, its window shopping disguised.
You will find that most that have been swinging for a long time, have a healthy sex life in their relationship and don't need to swing for the sake of sex or emotional reasons, they will have sex just as regularly if swinging or not swinging, all of them will have times of high activity, where they run of behind every wall that they pass, to times where they will have sex once or twice a week or less. You will also find that they are still very much in love, the ones that have been swinging for many years will mostly tell you that they do take a break from swinging from time to time, not consciously but just because they are not in the mood for it.
Last 1c. Cheating means you are doing something without your partner's consent, swinging as a couple you are doing it with each other's consent. So maybe your idea of swinging as a form of cheating is misplaced......
Those spellers among you, seeee I didnt make 1 slepping msitake 
Let me elaborate on the above...
The trick to being dishonest is getting away with the lie. A man who has no more intimate feelings for his wife will most likely not be jealous of her. He will then not mind if another man pounds away at her, so long as he is also doing that mans wife... His wife believes he loves her dearly and they are just swinging... But he actually does not have the deep feelings required in a marriage, he just enjoys boning other men's wives... Easy to pull off the wife will be none the wiser. Most liars are good liars..
Sex God
Quote by Stamina
Let me elaborate on the above...
The trick to being dishonest is getting away with the lie. A man who has no more intimate feelings for his wife will most likely not be jealous of her. He will then not mind if another man pounds away at her, so long as he is also doing that mans wife... His wife believes he loves her dearly and they are just swinging... But he actually does not have the deep feelings required in a marriage, he just enjoys boning other men's wives... Easy to pull off the wife will be none the wiser. Most liars are good liars..
You have a valid point, but in my opinion, if that was the case with the husband (male) it would not last for too long as if he was switched off as such, he would eventually no longer be able to "perform" with his own misses, and then the moo poo will strike the windmill . . . . ..
So yes, it is a reality (in my opinion) but won't last too long . . . . . .
Orgasminator
Its one thing cheating behind your partners back, but in the lifestyle the biggest mistake anyone can make is been foolish enough to think their partner does not see how they react to other people and if that behaviour is appropriate.
You may fool your partner a few times but it won't take long before your explaining why you should get the house, and that the dogs really do love you more.
in our scenario, it went like this: i wanted to see my wife doing another man. i didnt even consider the fact of boning other woman while my wife agrees to it. our first time would have been a mfm threesome, but the guy chickend out. only after he chickend out, a friend pointed me in the direction of SH, and that was intriging for both of us. after we started chatting to a bunch of people, and taking the plunge to do our first swing, our relationship feels much stronger than before. we can now talk about anything without the other one getting iritated or mad. we even commincate better than before. before hand we asked ourselfs what if this and what if that. we have a mutual feeling that it is only sex, and nothing emotional.
my 2 cents
Sexlightened
In theory, swinging is all about absolute honesty, firstly with each other (as a couple) and secondly with everyone else whom you may befriend in the lifestyle. Swingers are, simply put, people who have chosen to embrace their natural, carnal desires in an honest and open way rather than follow society's norms.
In theory the philosophy of the lifestyle is pure, honest and genuine however; as with any religion or club; there will be those that (either through ignorance or due to having their own agenda) will use the lifestyle as a vehicle for deceit. Not all swingers are true swingers....
As for the "lack of jealousy due to lack of intimacy" comment: jealousy is not a result of feeling a deep love/intimacy with one's partner. Jealousy stems from our own insecurities.
Those who enter the lifestyle/start swinging for the "wrong" reasons do not last long. Swinging uncannily tends to illuminate the truth of a relationship status.
The majority of the people who participated in my studies reported enjoying their swinging experience. There was no difference between the levels of swinging satisfaction of men and women.
I also found that swingers are very happy in their marriages and have strong emotional bonds with their spouses, strong family units, and aren't looking for additional emotional connections or trying to replace the ones they currently have. Moreover, my respondents claim that their spouses are able to satisfy them sexually: Swinging to them is a way of adding spice and variety to the marriage itself, (some even referred to swing as a 'team sport,' or 'the couple that plays together remains together').
The above is from phsycologytoday, I totally agree with it
Warming the Bed
Playcouple could not put it any better
that's exactly how it goes in our lives, its not our start all end all we swing we stop then swing again as it suits us.
sorry and for the question it was not suggested by any one of us it just started on a party that went horribly wrong...(or shall I say it went freeking awesome)
I wish I could say I just wanted to prove to the missus that there is smaller willy's than mine 
:lol: :lol:
:lol: :lol: Quote by stoutgatte2013
Playcouple could not put it any better
that's exactly how it goes in our lives, its not our start all end all we swing we stop then swing again as it suits us.
sorry and for the question it was not suggested by any one of us it just started on a party that went horribly wrong...(or shall I say it went freeking awesome)
I wish I could say I just wanted to prove to the missus that there is smaller willy's than mine
He he he... That sounds cool.. I think when it "just happens" as apposed to someone suggesting it must be the best.
