We have been on this site for ages now, and only had one reply to the loads of messages we have sent to profiles that my wife and I like the look of.
Nobody responds, so it seems to me that the site is not functional at all.
Anyone agree, or are there just too few members on this sit for it to work properly?
James
Join the most popular community of South African swingers now
Login
Does anyone even use this site?
last reply
13 replies
1.7k views
0 watchers
0 likes
Orgasminator
Perhaps you must looked at the message you send, is that what members like to hear. Tell them what you want and some advise looked at the wording of your profile add, only my penny
Master of Sex
Correct me if I'm wrong? You mailing mostly females? If so how do u go about it. Personally, I don't respond to couples because of how they approach me. Also, sometimes we want attention from males and maybe haven't changed the details on our profiles. I say if u want to meet real people, get out there to meet and greets etc to network.
Sex God
This particular question / topic tends to get raised from time to time, although usually by single males.
I myself am in a "smaller town" which ultimately means less members, yet as I have said before, I do in fact have a fairly good "success rate".
Added to that, every-time I visit the Cape (Eastern or Western) I never have a trip that I did not at least have drinks with someone. In fact, Cape Town has been very good to me over the years.
I would like to give you some advice and or suggestions, but obviously I cannot, seeing as I have a different type of profile than you do. Perhaps it is the content of your initial message?
Orgasminator
First off you looking for a unicorn, she appears from time to time but is extremely hard to find and even harder to lay your hands on. To complicate issues further you insist she must be blond reducing your likelyhood of success even further.
Considering ahe would have to be close to your location you have restricted yourself to what I would estimate at less than 1% on the total membership of the site.
Now ask yourself why should those few ladies that you are targeting pick you. You are competing with 20% of the members for her attention, she's the one in control, she as her pick of who she wants to meet and play with. If you fail to get her attention, intrigue and excite her. Its over, you've had your chance.
Warming the Bed
Al I can say to you is "dream on!!" Your Profile is not the kind single girls will respond to.
We have regular parties at our place and after many years in the lifestyle we see single girls asking to join us again and again.
They know they are safe, they know its not a bunch of weirdo's attending, they know they are in control and that's the reason we have more girls attending our parties than men.
Quote by 2ForFun
Al I can say to you is "dream on!!" Your Profile is not the kind single girls will respond to.
We have regular parties at our place and after many years in the lifestyle we see single girls asking to join us again and again.
They know they are safe, they know its not a bunch of weirdo's attending, they know they are in control and that's the reason we have more girls attending our parties than men.
Well said. Single women return to where they feel safe and enjoy themselves. To the point where they would spend weekends and be game for an impromptu fourth or whatever person joining for an evening knowing that that person is fine even though they may never have seen or met them.
Ok JamesSue
I had a look at your profile, there are particular things I "read" when I see it
First it's clear that you guys are quite into fetish - fetish is not synonymous with swinging. Most swingers are pretty vanilla.
Then you're new to the lifestyle, which means anyone wanting to play with you is likely going to be quite seasoned or also super timid and new - problem with that - you're looking for bi females which are rare anyways, now you need a newbie who is already into fetish - coz your profile implies that is what you're looking for, someone who is into being submissive (so you're on the wrong site), or someone who is "old hat" at this, super confident and a pro at laying down personal boundaries (most single women don't last online because of the way they are generally treated like free prostitutes) - women in that category are almost invariably in a couple on this site - they may play alone, but they're likely in a couple (unless you count PIB - but she's not playing ATM - though she might a be a good person to chat to about the fetish angle).
Next I look at your pics - which are great by the way. But now it's extremely in my face that you guys like to play rough (crops, butt plugs etc)... which isn't my thing at all and I'm thinking... "sexy, but no thanks".
Now I read your ad; oh crap - I don't qualify anyway - I'm not blonde.
I think the key here is that there are too many obstacles to someone connecting with you. Accept that chances are - there just aren't any blonde, single, bi women in the "new but willing to be flogged" or "been around the block and can show you the ropes" categories to choose from, never mind someone who meets all those requirements AND actually also wants to shag you guys (coz of course she also has the right to choose or not choose you).
My suggestion: take all the fetish stuff out of the profile, don't require it or look for it until you're comfortable with the swinging community, established and experienced. Join a fetish lifestyle site too (mail me for suggestions), so you can explore that in a more accommodating context. Go to the Meet & Greets that happen fairly regularly. Don't be so picky about her hair colour. Try to add something about not minding if the woman is otherwise attached to a swinging partner, but that you only want her to join you. Go to a club a few times, meet people, network. Look for couples who have a male voyeur and a female exhibitionist; having him watch is small price to pay for getting your kicks - if an audience is a turnoff, ask if streaming/photos/videos will suffice.
Good luck!
Forum Virgin
A lot has been said about your profile and the things you want and need appose to what you will get just remember one thing you are a coupe and you are looking for a girl to join you, single guys are easy and a dime a dozen and they can look after themselves while single ladies cannot and if they meet up with somebody they need to feel safe and having a phone chat and drinks afterwards is not going to give her the security she needs to feel safe and comfortable with you guys remember we live in a cruel world and nothing is safe and sacred any more. Secondly come on man get rid of those pics on your profile really,part of meeting new people is a bit of advertising show some flesh get some naughty pics post them we all do the same its no shame especially the pick that looks like you are wearing a nappy if you don't want to expose your privates fine but at least get into a jockey or a G string or something, all you can see from the Mrs is her bum and something that can hurt someone ,don't get me wrong I am not saying you must show your dick or your wife's privates but show your body's so people can see and drool over it.
And lastly a suggestion speak to the wife and meet some couples with Bi ladies trust me its much easier go into soft swinging to start your fantasy with, trust me it will start out as soft swinging but if the mood is right the ladies will take it from there and contrary to some believe most of us are gentlemen and will not touch your wive if you or her does not consent to it but we will still have a fabulous time watching the ladies. Then people will start to know you you will get credentials and single ladies will hear it and before you know it you are having fun with all the ladies you and your wive can handle
Just my take on this
Ps and please don't take anything I said personally you asked and we reply sometimes things are said that you don't want to hear but unfortunately must hear for thing to get better
Master of Sex
Lol, im the only unicorn on this topic. It's so funny the way, we are being described lol. Like a rare wildlife species. How to lure us in and what to feed us hahaha. Sorry it's funny.
Warming the Bed
Quote by Sofistikitty
Lol, im the only unicorn on this topic. It's so funny the way, we are being described lol. Like a rare wildlife species. How to lure us in and what to feed us hahaha. Sorry it's funny.
Wel said!!
:lol: :lol: Warming the Bed
Quote by playcouple
Well said. Single women return to where they feel safe and enjoy themselves. To the point where they would spend weekends and be game for an impromptu fourth or whatever person joining for an evening knowing that that person is fine even though they may never have seen or met them.
So so very true.... seen it many times.
