I believe lots of foreplay and even some afterplay is what good sex is all about. All of it is part of- and complementary to - penetrative sex. The fun does not only begin with penetration and it certainly does not have to end with it either. I would rather give my play partner two or three orgasms to my one (or none even). I get pleasure from giving, and I am patient, varying speeds and angles, paying attention to verbal and non-verbal cues. To find what brings an individual play partner to orgasm is like finding a buried treasure. The entire journey to get there is a big part of the fun. No reason to be in a rush.